page 60

On the Way to Machu Picchu, 60

Before dawn, the morning when I will leave the highlands, I see the star Sirius. I'm not alone. Sirius' energies and the Sisterhood surround me. A piece of material from the star is embedded in me. Its aura shines through mine to help give the leadership of Health to Earth. I cry big sobs. I'm all wet, remembering my failures. But the star in me is bright, stronger than tears and dries me out. Boom!! A cannon shot shakes the atmosphere. Today is the Peruvian Fiesta of Independence. For me it celebrates new inner light.

A stone monument at the airport seems to represent Incan windows in flight to the Point. I mingle with the spiritual tour group again. We meet a shaman from the Brotherhood of the Seven Rays. He says my preparation was not right for going there. I hug him goodby.

I fly, mind misted as the sky, watching the beautiful river curving ribbons in the jungle. We come down beside it in Iquitos. For days in the oppressive heat of the wet jungle air it will be impossible to separate from descension. I'm in mourning for my old self. I hate Tschiripaiya. She believed in what she was doing. I hate her for using me and leaving me this dirty future with nothing to look forward to. I'm a middle-aged woman in an ugly foreign city. I can't seem to get to the bottom of my grief, it seems so much greater than I, a jungle I can't quite reach. I'm sorry Sisterhood, light vibrations, gold Capstone. She was the flower then; now I'm the faded, crushed, withered blossom. Maybe the Sirius star piece is illuminating my negativity. Everything is crude, dull, meaningless. My indifference may be a mask for disappointment that this long-awaited trip was so meagre in actuality; in fantasy, rich. I made a good story out of paltry scant material. And there's only a shred of evidence in its truth or goodness--the group connection at Machu Picchu. Can I rest my case on such slim proof? If I do believe the story, the let-down of having been deserted by my main personality component is unbearable.

Thank Goddess! I reconnect in my yoga with the gold Cosmic Juice drop of the ethereal Sun Disc of Lake Titicaca. I get the feeling I could increase it. I await the consensus of the Sisterhood Council of EIE and seekers of the Cosmic Juice. I can make a giant puddle out from lake Titicaca to Iquitos and all around.

{Wholeo Online} ~ {Trips} ~ {Wholeo} ~ {Books} ~ {Start Machu Picchu} ~ {iconFull size}

{To Lake Titicaca: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19
To Matrix: 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33
To Machu Picchu: 34 35 36 37 38 39 40 41 42 43 44 45 46 47
To Amazon Jungle: 48 49 50 51 52 53 54 55 56 57 58 59 60 61 62 63 64 65}

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© 1981, 2003 Caroling. All rights reserved. Last Modified: 23 March, 2003