MET (Major Event of Transformation Body) and tetrahelical core

Major Event of Transformation (MET) torus with tetrahelical core from Blue Pool movie

weB log 2015

About ~ 2011 ~ 2012 ~ 2013 ~ 2014 ~ 2016 ~ {2017} New entries go on top but within an entry, time is chronological. The next Wholeo new year restarts on the December solstice. Remember if something is undefined, it might have appeared on an earlier date. Read from bottom up. Or search the page. This year starts with a focus on Elobeing.

Entries: December (2014) 21, 22, 23, 24, 24, 27, 28, 29, 31. January (2015) 02, 03, 04, 06, 08, 10, 11, 12, 16, 20, 22, 23, 24, 26, 28, 30, 31. February 01, 03, 05, 15, 18, 19, 21, 22, 23. March 03, 05, 07, 12, 14, 16, 18, 20, 21, 22, 24, 25, 28, 30. April 01, 02, 03, 04, 05, 07, 08, 09, 11, 14, 18, 20, 21, 22, 25, 26, 27, 28. May 02, 03, 05, 07, 08, 09, 11, 12, 13, 16, 18, 19, 20, 22, 25, 27, 29, 30, 31. June 01, 02, 03, 04, 05, 06, 07, 08, 09, 12, 13, 16, 17, 19, 21, 22, 24, 25, 27, 28, 29, 30. July 1, 2, 09, 12, 15, 18, 20, 22, 24, 25, 28. August 15, 19, 20, 25, 28, 29, 30. September 01, 02, 04, 05, 08, 09, 11, 12, 13, 14, 17, 21, 22, 23, 26, 27, 28, 29 30. October 02, 03, 04, 07, 08, 09, 10, 11, 12, 14, 18, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 31. November 02, 05, 07, 08, 10, 11, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 25, 27, 28, 29, 30. December 01, 06, 10, 11, 13, 15, 16.

2015-12-16

Is it the Wizard of Oz or the Wizard of Us? I like myself in today's video exploring the pink-tagged trail. I'm enjoying it so. Studied all the rules for visiting a Florida State forest and am encouraged that I can drive in, park and do the hike. I must get an annual pass though.

2015-12-15

In a dream I got a hug that was divine.

2015-12-13

Walked Lake2Lake on Hwy 30A. Got a huge new vision of torus with a flowing sheaf that extends previous visions. Rather than describe, I must artwork it.

Remembering an important thought from Alice McCall's Wellness Wisdom book about healing herself. She treated the cancer as a dianosis, not a feature of her own consciousness. So her treatment was to become stronger in wholeness. This way of thinking can apply to many situations driven by the outside world. A diagnosis is not the whole picture.

2015-12-11

Dissolve self into holographic cells of self so can be more everywhere. Walked on the beach honoring the 13th new moon of the year. Suffered respiratory discomfort from the red tide. Saw several dead fish and a large dead bird by the inoutfall.

2015-12-10

3:30AM wakeup, channeling classic Elobeing. Later singing Santa Lucia with a head wreath with candles of light and streamers that are like Elobeing on earth.

2015-12-06

Pearl-stepping on Lake2Lake walk. I'm making this a love way. People who come through here get a healing, a spiritual healing. That feeling of fear and needing to kill the government, greater body makes me so sad. I think if they could feel the love of the forest trees live with each other, grow, each gets its own space. I don't know, maybe things are right as they are. I want them to feel hugged. A hug is connecting. And feel love and return love. And do our best. That's what we do. Actually nothing is needed. But as spiritual healer says, "Bring to them whatever it is that they need". That's what Frank used to say. He didn't say we're going to decide what you need or bring to you what we think is good for you. What does each little part need? To be its little part?

2015-12-01

Woke up feeling slightly orderly. Drinking water from blue glass as computer starts up, Thinking how consciousness of water is fearless, enjoying any form it takes. How when becoming part of my body is like me finding a new path though the woods. Adventure. From there arose the thought that I'm largely a bag of water, perhaps water is a higher form of consciousness and I'm progressing to being that.

Whenever I see something fungal emerging from earth, realizing that the world-wide web of mycelium wants to reproduce here, I click a mental "Like" button. Many mushrooms, earth balls, earth stars and puff balls are doing that here now. Always a good time to tune in and connect with the internet of nature. The natural internet. Should I call it a natural under-earth network?

2015-11-30

Explored the clearings yet again, starting from the east, which turned out to be two miles farther. On the way I discovered a new trail through the forest. It connects the existing nature trail to the clearings that by now we are sure will be primitive campsites. It was beautiful. Fresh, lightly traveled, carpeted with deer lichen.

2015-11-29

Explored the lake clearings again with a friend, starting from a slightly different location. We had enjoyed a walking meditation event previously and decided to do that. Attention is on the here and now. Conversation is to share what is happening.

2015-11-28

New lease on life and new direction in art. Not show things. Not show solid state, although could start there. Person on earth. POE moving around. POEMA moving with sun. POEMAMWS somehow showing the movement of twisting around x axis and y axis to show galactic rotation and movement in galactic cluster. Once you become aware, or take on the information, your expanded consciousness needs to synergize, to integrate that with everything you have thought before. Trickle down expansion. Maybe this is part of being a big bang baby. Expansion is the experience. Meditation, bringing everything to zero state, is a constant dance.

Explored new clearings in the forest by the lake nearby.

2015-11-27

Urgent Care chest x-ray and EKG determined lungs are clear and I've recovered from pneumonia.

2015-11-25

OMGiddy Gracious Me, beauty meter has gone off scale. Up in night drinking camomile tea, smudging, sitting in meditation with turquoise and geome in hands. Nothing to record. I had been so uncomfortable in bed feeling so sick like sure I was dying. Felt the fine fast minuscule vibration for awhile. Being there for the experience. Like Georgiana, visionless. Thoughtless. Finally back to sleep and shocked by the alarm at 4:15. Considered the option of sleeping in but curiousity drove me up. Dressed and looked out to see that, yes, sky is unbelievably clear and moon is fully lit up.

Prepared coffee and left at 4:50. Went to parking lot in Deer Lake State Park as the gate was open. Just walking in beauty. Set up. Everything was impervious to cold except tshirt, hoodie and jacket. Could have used another layer. Buttoned down and up and cinched sleeves. Huddled on stairs with coffee, that was the most out of the wind place. Wind coming from NE. Got tantalized by views though. Spent most of the half hour of video taking pictures with my old camera. As I got the whole arc, clear and simple beauty meet off the scale. Didn't feel cold at all. Or tired. Or limited in any way. Complete joy. What a blessing. As I came back down the ramp it seemed such a pity to die when I can live like this. Seems so precious and perfect and fulfilling. Maybe this is it. Seems like a pinnacle of being human, to be conscious of the beauty of creation. Of all the tiny passing spritz of beauties.

I went back for moon rise about 5PM. Many folks here for holiday looking at the sunset near full moon time. The moon rose and I got good series of videos, zooming in twice. Too tired to stay 30 minutes needed to match the morning shoot. Gate to the park was closed but could open the lock and relatch it after going through.

Now almost 8, feeling rotten. Should I go to the Urgent Care clinic? Seems like I should. But 99% don't want to. All that sickness focused. Given steroids and drugs and I guess afraid of the implications of finding out how I am. Short term vs long term quandary. Do I just wait it out, enjoying my last moments? Or do I sacrifice this present with yucky office visits, drug purchases, driving around on the chance that I can prolong life. Is it a choice between a now that I have and other nows that I might have by forgoing the current one.

2015-11-21

Hiked to local campsite and found it does not have electricity. Plus hunting is allowed. Searched all local parks and forests and chose Topsail Hill Preserve State Park. Rented tentsite for Dec. 20-22, two nights including the Outer Solstice. Looks empty so I bet I can stay longer if I wish.

2015-11-20

Blue doors While camping, I remember a couple of times of seeing blue lights, the pale light kind that I have seen in meditation previously, especially the all day one. In the woods on 11/16 I saw two bluish corridors opening up. One to SW, one to E. I called them blue doors. Looks like where the gap in the near trees opens to view of farther trees, so the atmosphere blues them out.

Color healing to Fine, fast minuscule vibration installed. The vibe came last night. If feels like a motor or pacemaker. At times it has felt like it might be outside myself, like upstairs or outdoors. I know that if I were telling this to someone, they might ask if maybe i'm just tuning into some level of my being that is always there but I haven't been aware of before. I would reply that it didn't feel like that. If it wasn't a little something put there, it could have been something switched on, like a faucet. I hope it isn't some jacuzzi effort to stir the water in my lungs.

It is seeming to come and go. Sometimes off or really close to off.

I can feel my lungs gurgling. Or is it my breakfast? It feels above the diaphragm. Got scared, called a foundational doctor. They will send forms for me to study. Doesn't take insurance so will be expensive above what I could get Medicare to cover, filing the forms myself.

2015-11-19

Jamie Flynn led the ECMS meditation by playing gongs and bells. It was fun. I knew when it ended. Or at least until that point I didn't think it ended and when I heard that particular combo of notes I thought it would be a good closing point. And it was. It was a little ambiguous cuz the little bells he used to start meditation were not the ones he used to close it. He said that everything changes the gongs so he never knows what sound will emerge. Nancy and I thought that would make everything an improvisation.

When I saw him we touched foreheads. I learned that he is a December 21 solstice baby too. That is significant and he feels so too.

I started to think about tenting it outdoors for the solstice.

2015-11-18

Yesterday my photos were looking so beautiful. But I noticed that the TV looked beautiful too. I don't trust my judgement in any absolute sense since I'm seeing beauty that others might miss. But I'm enjoying my choices.

Lungs sound absolutely awful today. Can't cough up any phlegm but feels like I should. Sniffy nose. Gurgly breathing. Bummer. Later chest is tight but not painful.

2015-11-17

Woke up knowing I'm too tired to join FTA work party today. Just remembered that when camping I saw two falling stars when lying in sleeping bag. Both from upper left down to lower right. NE to SW. First was short regular slight arc. The second was a different night, thicker, longer and irregular. Like drawn clumsily, arc and then wiggle. Impressive.

2015-11-16

Walking down my path to sunrise, I hate to leave. The stars were great last night too. Saw the dittos. I think Pegasus framed for starters. Orion, Gemini. Lots that I don't recognize. Slept flawlessly.

Had many dreams. The one I remember vividly is an attack like war of the worlds with a wall of water advancing like a huge rectangular bar that would surely engulf us. That seemed like pneumonia.

I just photographed the blue doors at 7:04 or so. The woods are only dimly lit by the overcast dawn and look particularly blue misted but two openings seems especially framed in blue hue.

8AM I have talked to Tom, said I felt bad and was leaving. He pledged to get some group shots so the video doesn't just have the 5 people I was with.

Dear Mother I remember in your dying days, you said "O well, it's just money." We have enough by watching it carefully for most of the time. When don't get the best deal, do not let it wreck the lovely little time we have left.

Strange the way I feel so lousy when I move does not deter me from absolutely adoring being out here. If I ever feel really well again, I'm going to go camping by Eastern Lake and just camp, not socialize or be part of a group. Just cosmic camping with the essence of tree sisters.

Yikes feeling almost nauseous, sick, edge of shaky. Almost finished breakfasting. Still not sure if want to hang out for the whole day. When one of the clouds covers the sun and it feels a bit drear, I think to get out of here. I wish to get the depth of earth connection as much as possible.

Enjoy this day free from normal life. Rhythm of tree trunks. Could be like drum beats or even songs. I have moved my chair for shade and not looking in sun. The new vista of trees is just as interesting.

Sitting here thinking of the video suddenly at 10:38 seeing the interesting cross branches, the horizontal rhythms that I had missed before. Gosh I love being here. Content in name, container and being.

Starting to dread packing up. If I'm this sick sitting here, how awful am I going to be in movement? All the pine needles I've seen here have three in a bundle. What does squirrel tail flicking mean? Just saw one coming down tree, closest of any yet. Pauses about eye level and does rapid tail waving like waving a flag and it ripples down the extent of fabric, in this case tail hairs. Bush. Maybe he was checking out the picnic table where I probably left some crumbs.

I only hope I haven't set health back by this indulgence in life that I love. The thought of going home doesn't beckon at all. This environment now is way more pleasant. Being able to see all around. Maybe I should have a tiny house like this. Could be motor home I guess, with supplies in the vehicle part.

The FTA video idea is to present my stuff, then add the people section saying these people all had experiences something like this or in the same setting, but I could not capture and present them all. See the Meetup site for logistics, their comments and photos.

Keep forgetting to drink enough water. Wonder why both hips hurt when I walk? I think it is because of not doing yoga. Would one day have such an impact? Might be the constrained sleeping postures. Electrolytes. Still haven't found the salt I packed.

Didn't realize that the carton of Cabernet Sauvignon wine was organic, from Paso Robles CA, 2012. Perfect for Cosmic Camping. It tastes the way I love wine to taste, not with the vinegary bitters of my cheap wine. Ah this is a great celebration.

Alternate plan, leave tent up here and go back to SRB for the night. If I feel lousy tomorrow morning, I can just come get tent and leave before 11. Hmm. So many options, only one choice for each string of moments.

Is that because of the particular mindset we're conscensicizing? Some direction of incarnation? Impossible to know if there would be other setups, like being able to follow all desired options in any particular moment. Or experience parallel timelines. I should read more sci fi. I bet writers have explored these ideas. The realities are too tempting for me to be the only one entranced by the possibilities.

1PM and it is warming up. There is dappled light in here but enough shade and am actually continuing to be comfortable. Not being very cosmic. Felt good, in motion, so walked the red trail until too tired and no cypresses in sight, which was .4 mile. Rested and started loading car, took down tent. At the end Larry and Tom returned from pinning west of Hollington on Lafayette section. Larry came over and invited me to come to the trail cutting tomorrow. Be there at 8:15. Have to call Tom if not coming. Larry said that it is short and close enough to the trail head that I can get a ride back. I thought it would be fun.

Writing this after I'm home, eating a big salad, aching especially in back and suffering a painful itchy bug bite by my spine. It started bothering me on the drive home. I can't see a tick but could be nymph. Took photos and still can't tell.

I do not think I'll feel like going out photographing trail building ever again. I love it. Do I? It is getting repetitive. Do not want to look at email and get sucked away from trip. I want to study photos and transcribe anything I said. I want to go back to the woods and evade my life. Scared about the back bite.

2015-11-15

I had a good night. So cold going to sleep that had on down and shell jackets. Fleece headband, lined pants, down booties. Woke up for one view of Pleiades, glimpse of Orion, some scattered stars but mostly fought to keep the sleeping bag hood over my head as I turned around. Not so crampy. Pretty comfortable and got lots of sleep, waking at 5:30. Decided that being here for dawn is my most precious time and am loving it to the hilt.

Futzed around and finally had made two sandwiches. Got everything over to the tent camp. Found out that they were going to the middle of CRS and no way out to my car. So should pack for all day. I get vitamins in pineapple juice, vitamin pills, computer in a bag and orange vest for hunters and boots. Just in time for them pulling out. No time to fill pack with water.

Riding in Tom's truck with Maria and Anne, who discovered they lived near each other in Miami, but both left before 1990s. We get to the gate and the keys don't work so we have to go way around. Some wet areas. Tom described how when the river is up, the streams are up and they can't go down because the river is so high, so they stay backed up for a long time. I should know this from Monte Rio, CA.

The highlight of the drive were two hogs that ran in front of the truck. I didn't see them well, just a big dark shape dashing in front of the car. There was a loud noise which came to me as collision but they said it was Tom jamming on the brakes, which prevented collision. Exciting.

Tom's plan is to lop and mow first long part south and then if time, north part. So we are in a spot where I got very tired last year. I followed the loppers but they went too fast for me.

I sat in semi shade. Lost and found hearing aid. Took it out to listen to voicemail. Then thought to do Instagram, totally forgetting the hearing aid. Got too hot moved 20' to some shade. Suddenly wondered about hearing aid, remembered taking it out. Looked and looked for 10 minutes or so. Was uploading photos and dingbatting around. Drank and ate vitamins, that kind of stuff. Suddenly thought of the photo of the mileage from pedometer. Studied the pattern of grass in the background. Went off to find S and C grasses. Where I started looking was the hearing aid. I was so happy, for avoiding the money loss, the hassle, the wreck of my FTA involvement.

They returned. We ate lunch. Tom told story of son of the hunter we saw, who had a son that died of pneumonia, thought he had a cold or flu. Tom is worn out on mower that goes up and down over the furrows. Hard work to steer it. I so much want to lie down.

Back in my tent, looking at the woods and loving the misty way the tree trunks rise up. The thin trunks are sharply modeled, so very distinct, but their feet are a mystery. Wonder if they ever burn here? Anyway the vegetation on the ground is so fuzzy and softly lit, that it seems like a cloud. I don't want to be outside because of bugs, but in here photos have to be taken through the mesh. Don't know if any of them are successful. I tried the manual focus and it zooms into a fine tuning slider where can choose focus, but still mitigated by the screen. It is a green mist. That's the main photo I want from it, upward columns from green mist.

Went to dinner and sat by Tom and Bruce. I wanted to be clear that I couldn't spend another day like today. Need to get out, do a short task and leave. Tom spent a long time describing how everyone sees it from their own point of view and his role to keep the whole week together. Each person doesn't get the whole picture. I'm not sure that applied to me. Ya it probably did.

I felt worse than ever. People back around the campfire, but I just left, bashing myself on the mowers in the parking lot. Got back, did teeth and pretty much went right to bed. When was it that got horrendous cramp in left thigh. It would not stop and I just laid there with it. Some of my usual wails of please stop. Help. It persisted. This night was warmer. Comfortable sleeping.

2015-11-14

I woke up about 4:30 and drove to the rest room. By the time I got back, it was getting light enough to make tea, coffee, a can of lentils and veggies with Parmesan cheese and cilantro, enjoying breakfast while sunrise rose through the trees. At 7 was not yet done but did get over to the tent area in time to meet and talk to Florida Trail people.

For the work day, in my car, followed Tom up to where the trail crosses Hwy 81, not at 7 Runs. Tom, Mayo, woman, guy, were cutting new section of the trail. A reroute to avoid a road walk. Tom explained how the water coming on the slope affected trail choice. Also don't know exactly where it is until do some clearing. It was flagged but cutting logs for mower and clearing helped narrow down where it should be. I was able to follow them, enjoyed getting video for a video, I know now more what I like to see. I think I got some really good stuff.

At 10:30 I ran out of steam. They were about halfway and there was no way I would stay for completion although would have loved to.

Interesting, I wanted to be open to the sky at night. Then remembered always putting things in tent, covering boots, making sure everything was covered to prevent them getting soaked with dew. However, I was not aware of any dew issues. I did cover electronics with jacket to bury the lights. But nothing was wet. Happy.

I am enjoying being out here. Not getting any big inspirations. Except last night when had a galactic hologram moment. I thought it was important enough to record. Couldn't remember location of sketchbook or ability to draw so did an audio on camera. Here's what I said: "I was looking at all this wonder for hours and hours and hours and hours. All of a sudden I had what I thought was a profound thought. Looking at stars of Gemini. The center of the galaxy is directly under, behind me. Then thought of looking at me from there, such a tiny part of this whole. Then I thought some little cell down in my right foot by the third toe, like, like a person with respect to GC. Like that would be more IT than my consciousness would be more centered above. All of a sudden I felt just like a map. Like a hologram. Like each part is the whole thing. Map God (?). Experiencing itself as different. Maybe the essential is the same."

One interesting visual is the light on tree trunks from sun. warm bright at dawn. Subtle soft in the afternoon, on the other side. Have been eating pumpkin seeds, ginger, spicy hot tortilla chips and wine for a long time. At dinner time I got to the tent camp and there was a huge gorgeous fire with a tight ring of drinking, chattering, laughing people having a great time. Could not understand a word, but loved the crescent moon through the trees.

Then it is Tom's birthday, missed the cake singing but the view of the sugary cake turned me off.

2015-11-13

A camping I will go today for the start of the FTA event that I document here. Had trouble going to sleep last night. Back side ached and I feared pneumonia. Waking up to slightly sore throat. Slightly tizzy thinking I really should not do this. But juggernaut of desire is pushing me. At least one night. But prepare for 10.

At Pine Log State Forest I got my new sky view tent up really easily and fast. Surrounded by pine trees near and far. Love it. Saw squirrels, birds and a woodpecker.

It is sunny, not too many bugs, and temperature is just how I like it. I am looking south. Sun going down to my right. Content is the place to be. Wish I had a side table and footrest. I have made one out of rug, two sleeping pads and yoga pad.

The wind is in the treetops. None down here. Two squirrels, getting closer. Swatted a huge mosquito that left a blood splot on the tent, so I have been bitten. Still don't feel it anywhere. This is so incredibly pleasant. I've wanted to do this my whole life. I remember sitting under some tree at a cabin or motel somewhere on a car trip with my parents. They say it is time to go. I want to just sit there. Not go. Of course I have done some tent camping, but never in a comfortable space like this. The tent I had at The Farm had tiny windows. It was a comfortable large space, but cut off. At the moment I don't ever want to go home.

Have electricity. That's nice. There is a WIFI signal here, belkin.ffa, requiring password. Herenow is not it. Wow. That's my password of the moment. Herenow. Suddenly at 3 felt withdrawal from the internet. Don't feel like recording anything. The most visual interest is the progression of tree trunks from near to far. For some reason reminds me of rhythms of drumbeats.

The changing light in the forest is so fascinating. I had spotted a curious shape that could have been an animal. When I looked back the whole scene is unrecognizable. Think of doing some photos but would have to do a lot of writing to say what interested me about them.

I should return food to car. Get warmer clothes. I'm loving my footrest too much to spread out sleeping quarters or make more rug cover. Well can drape sleeping bag over me for warmth. Food, too bad. Ah, tooth stuff is in the backpack. Must get that. I am so tired.

Drove to pee and saw ducks by the lake. Took some pics and video. Sun is setting. Florida Trail folks have a fire at 4pm. When got back it was too dark to even think about trying to deal with the stove and cooking or even heating up dinner. Peanut butter sandwich, tasted great. Did yoga. The stars were absolutely divine. Worth it.

Struggling for each little bit of my routine. I ended up wearing shirt and the heavy pullover thingie, pajama pants, down booties, sleeping bag with light sleeping bag over it. Used the hood feature of the bag, drawn tight around my face. Legs and other body parts on edge of cramping. Actual one real cramp but fixed by changing position.

I saw Orion and Sirius through the trees. I must be oriented more SE, yes the sunrise proved that. I could not imagine another night. The two pads are comfortable but trying to stay on them is hard.

2015-11-11

11:30-12 meditation. NewMoon12. I'm smudging camping gear in the light of the new moon. Imagining flipping around the x axis and then at the same time, spiraling around the z axis. It's fun. I'm intending it, not allowing it. Spinning, swimming, spirit swim, somersault. Marking intervals. Right side of waist back hurts aches. It helps to jiggle around. I do it and let the sound blare out. It's called the shake down shimmy.

2015-11-10

Getting a radically different view of physical conditions. Since we are cosmic creatures and our bodies run on software, our dis-eases should relate to a cosmic condition. Instead of battering the body processes at the lowest level we should look at it as a metaphor for guidance in our sacred mission. Like when the heart raced, that was a signal that am lost in Facebook, nothing for me there, need to return to my healing art tasks and paying attention to MCS.

Today I think I should walk lake2lake2GC when the sun is out and it warms up, maybe 10. In kitchen I felt tightness in rib cage, could that be what the lax MCS message mrune is about, expanding, deeper breathing? My fear of course is that pneumonia still prevails. My the blue sky in parting clouds is joyous.

I'm struggling with my culture-induced mindset that an artist is most successful when paid, shown, collected and written about. In short, famous. I have only lightly grazed these markers. But my inner mindset is the pursuit of content. I'm not sure where the longing for acknowledgment comes in. MCS seems to have a message that we are inner planes workers.

Did I name my tent? Wanting to call it "Content". Yes, found it on 4/2, "Ticlam". So it is Content Ticlam.

Deliciously wonderful walk. So good to be outdoors in my favorite place, lake2lake again. The visions expressed in my movie are helpful. Up in headhalo, I go galactic. I started flipping around. Sensation on earth of flipping around. As if it or we were on the x axis flipping toward the z. Now I'm looking toward the x-y. Like I had a skewer sticking into the z axis and I'm seeing it flip around clockwise. I'm not in it. Or am I?

2015-11-08

Inexplicably feeling this is the happiest day of my life. Feel like dancing every time I'm vertical. Love what I have to eat and drink. Feel healthy. Centered. I surf the web with interest but nothing seems to compare to art, the galactic spine and our actual incarnation evolution act. If I'm able to camp for more than a day I'm going to deepen my cosmic connection via Gaia. Spinal galacting via Gaia.

Thinking about being grounded and the feeling of earth turning around sun but maintaining fixed tipped axis of rotation. Fixed attachment to sun even when moving around it. When do I feel tilted? I don't and yet there is some twingling tickling tapping somewhere to pay attention to how the whole galaxy tilt-a-whirls us so I'm upside down but really in some other field than gravity. Maybe that's the sense of another dimention. Love it when I misspell dimension, making it look like dimentia. Dementia.

OK that's why it is better to dwell at GC than on earth, that is mentally, psychically, imaginatively, with full coding software. At GC have left that fixed, set grounded sense behind and can be more free to hop, skip, jump to connect 5D.

Working on movie I realize I need a transition, but what? This seems so hard that web addiction kicks in. I need to check email. But why? OK I give in out of fake curiousity. Really creative cowardice.

2015-11-07

I'm finishing the Lake2Lake movie and have no inspiration beyond. It is weird for me, taking a step at a time, just knowing one task and nothing until it is done and the next task presents itself. Very strange schizy mood where part of me just feels like dancing around carelessly. Part of me is disinterestedly depressed. Part sort of looking for answers. Mildly interested in finishing this movie. After that, looking forward to camping for a week, drilling down into nature. Ticla, the manufacturer of my new tent, has gone out of business. Hope my as yet untried tent works.

2015-11-05

Sprouting haiku

Why? Phytic acid.
What? Seeds, nuts, grains, beans, lentils.
How? Soak, sprout, dry, eat.

I talked about Eating Live at Emerald Coast Meditation Society tonight. Enjoyed it. My meditation went like this: Meditation half wandering into early conversations. There were several low short sounds of a gong from Nancy's side of the circle or maybe beyond. {Later Nancy said she had not heard anything.} Some interest in deep breathing. Separated thumbs halfway through. Felt incredible happiness. Wondered at the difference between that and what sometimes happens, being neutral. Felt a climax of some kind of intense bliss. Often felt the biological sprouting of connection. Torus energy so powerful. There was a time of feeling like a smear, like a piece of old wood that had been part of a tree. Big piece of bark. A rough vertical shape in proportions of 5X25 and 1 thick. Like a thickened spine. Felt healing energy exuding. Loving everything. Knee did not act up. Perfect posture.

2015-11-02

Enjoyed making video of misty forest in pouring rain. Later I am concerned. I have felt dizzy but more like wavery all over fuzzy jiggling like I could easily slip into palsy. Ate. Still feel uneasy. Pulse is 56. That is something I don't ever remember having. Feeling crumboidal. {Note it was back up to 68 the next day.}

2015-10-31

Yesterday sometime had a dream of wakeup with wrong decision and knowing that was death sentence. More dead than ever before, took me quite awhile to realize it was a dream and that I'm actually awake. Writing this it seems one interpretation of these death choice dreams is that what to earth person is death and unknown is actually an alive state. When sleeping I return there. From the dream person's point of view, making the wrong choice is death. Later met with three of Nancy's friends to form a support group.

2015-10-29

Thoughts with respect to the New and Full Moon 11 Vision graphics. In time we are in a new place in space, continuously in an analog sense. It has so much to offer that we need to open to, to develop a sense of it. My feeling is like when we walk in a forest there are different plants, animal life, colors, light, smells. We need to do this in space.

The movie Steve Jobs was absolutely awful for me. I wanted to hear what the actors were saying but I couldn't. Jobs was completely unlikeable. After maybe 20 minutes Nancy began having an atrial fibrillation episode. I drove her home and her son-in-law got her to the hospital where she stayed overnight.

2015-10-28

MCS Message Generator 'Welcome MCS" on 10-28-2015So many mrune multiples in the MCS Message Generator casting "Welcome MCS" (pops up an image as the generator itself is a Flash app). 20 total. 3 tick. 2 note. 4 lax. 2 balance. 2 trip. 2 dynamic is. Cathartic. Opposite. Sister. Ill. Grab. Bindmrunes are touching pairs. Tick-trip. Balance-ill. Tick-note. Balance-opposite.

I'm getting a circular overall pattern. A CCW pattern if read starting top right. A CW pattern if read starting in middle. This is the same as the Gspine. So how does it read timewise?

Trip lax balance-ill grab dynamic|is dynamic|is note tick trip tick tick-note cathartic balance-opposite lax lax lax sister. I get that this is all about my friend Nancy's ticker. Here I was expecting cosmic maybe alien, messaging. But it is, everything is cosmic. She is getting an electrical cardioversion today to treat her atrial fibrillation, to hopefully zap her heart back to normal rhythms.

2015-10-27

Wondering if rain and clouds will let me see full moon 11 today. Sunrise at 6:53 and simultaneous moonset at 6:53AM would have been nice to see. Woke at 4:45, felt misty air in black sky. Weather channel says cloudy. There are huge clouds over Gulf. I feel like chance of seeing moonset are nil.

MCS Message Generator test on 10-27-2015Cast an MCS contact message to test the Flash generator. Balance treble/Caroling make lax time tick balance trip lax treble friend hurl ding-bind-is savor. So there are 14 if consider the bindmrunes as one. How many doubles? 2 lax, balance, treble. If don't consider bind as one, there are 12 unique ones here. Reason I'm focusing on the numbers is that am considering finding a spiral relationship to the 12 pents in an EIEnor. I have it in three years of cardinal points. Wonder if there is a term that covers equinox and solstice points other than seasons.

Treble near full moon 11 in casting. Seeing a pattern. Balance treble lax group associated with trip and November full moons, lower right birth corner. Balance treble lax group associated with make expanded in development upper left corner. That could be grass/path. That leaves a diagonal from lower left to upper right. Ding-bind-is savor hurl friend tick (wrote check) time. Am feeling like lax is like relax. Short story is trip make friend time. There are enough colors for choosing for color choosing and flinging in carolyoga. Friend ding and lower lax are the only ones nearly upright.

I'm so sad I didn't get a recording of my visionary meditation. It was so illuminating, extensive, predictive and informative. First I smudged and read the mrunes in the message casting. There was insight into treble. I am the GBB. I am the MCS. Still time rules. The Grebe straight time, with Seraph superconductivity connection and Muzlo return from infinity = still time. There was the blue consciousness pupil with sun rays coming from outside and flowing in to center like petals inward from outward light. Do graphic. {Graphic link is here below the new moon 11 entry. Full size.}

One aspect was my question about flowing backwards. That is if sun is CW travel around the galaxy and my graphic is looking the other way. I develop connection beyond my back and am transducer to the feet of my galactic spine and also my world. Had the feeling I had in Peru when given the staff. Humble, feeling so unable, unequipped but accepting the info. There was a time of imagining being the MCS, experiencing the joy of meteor travel, the blast of earth contact and expansion into earth being. Just got now that there are many others like me and MCS. There was a time of honoring dualism. Or dualisms. Left/right. In/out. Up/down. What was the resolution of that?

Grappled with backing into the forward and looking back would sort of keep a stillness as opposite motions contradict each other. Reminded of the graphic of EIE with the figure zooming, wasn't it backward? Was in UU window design and stained glass. {See the page or the completed window.} Also the perfection of the inverted balance as my spirit coil broadening up and out for expansion while narrowing base to pin point focus ground.

2015-10-26

Have been thinking extensively about the radical impact changing healing generators has on my yoga. I do have to admit that the color of the nodes is not really important to me. But the pattern of colors is and I use and distribute them. Thinking I should call this an MCS mrune generator. Last night I figured out I could do 12 nodes for 4 cardinal points on 3 twists of the galactic spine and it felt good to be visualizing along the path. It is colorful but not specific, except in the runes.

For publishing, I'd better concentrate on whether this is a color healing or not. Perhaps at first it could just come from and link to the MCS page. Not sure it is healing. It is color in the munestones. So conflicted about MCS mrune generator direction.

I did a test casting, asking "Is it color, mune or mrune intent?" After studying the result, came to some conclusions. To decode my question color is less important than mune-mrune. It is message, story, pattern-oriented. I cannot see it as a color healing. OK is it healing in any way shape or form? Am I applying the message to my self, albeit for development or am I truly listening to an other?

I could read it as MCS story or say timeline on earth. So could the message be that MCS is fragmented and for me to get the message and develop, I must pay attention to my smallest parts? This exercise has definitively answered my question about how to introduce and present this on my web pages. Should I remove it from it's location? It does not belong in the Color section, it is an MCS messenger. Pros for keeping it there are inertia and the fact that it uses a color healing generator engine that already has way more content than color and it wasn't put in the consciousness section. It has some color, just less than previous. The original healing was a bunch of color books. Gradually became a layout and related to spirits. Then the runes came in. So there are several threads. I think keep it there but make it a parallel thread. I think for me it is the way ahead but if I miss the layout aspect, who knows, some synthesis might arrive. And that might make it more convincing as a successor to the EIEnor version.

2015-10-25

Walked Lake2Lake this morning. A whole swath of earthballs. About 2.5" in diameter. Only one top scored as if it is about to split. Enjoyed the sky going toward sunrise. I fell right into pearl step and headhalo. Did it often on the walk. Left open to guidance but can't remember any.

Wow earth has an "invariable orbital plane". Which is approximately the same as Jupiter's.

Finally the big news of the day is that the Flash engine is working. So glad. Feeling somewhat abused by the urgency of this guidance. It seems I should look at the mrune story as well as the physical success.

Getting this urgent feeling like I have to hurry. Personally not so jittery or shaky today. Doing fairly well.

All the support pages for runes need to be changed. Or not. I think this kind is different enough to have its own pages. So how to link them together needs a lot of thought. Maybe at first just keep them separate. For me, it is a progression. But for anyone else they might be of equal but separate interest. Is that completely true? I do feel like I'm moving on from the focus on brain cell and sets of 5WLBs that really aren't consciously very active. I don't deny that they are part of me, inseparable, like parents. But my life adventure is going galactic. So maybe I do want to put this at the top of the list. But I see it as links to separate pages because there is so much that is irrelevant and so much new stuff coming that they can't be merged as the previous ones were.

2015-10-24

Trying to figure out how to integrate expanded brain cell with MCS mrunes. Revisiting all the guidance. It seems that the EIEnor belled out. No geometric form. Flowing vibes. Maybe should reverse process. Throw and find a background if needed.

I have been reading Ralph Blum's book of runes, wondering how to cast ceramic stones, worried that the stones would break. Sure enough, he draws runes from the bag by hand. He said one rune seems to insert itself between fingers. I mixed mine up and drew the one inserted. It is "Time". That is Odin's or single rune for current situation. There are 3-spread, 5-spread, and 6-spread described.

Well getting a single rune without a description of its qualities is difficult. Maybe I should meditate on a single one for a day to try to get meaning for it. My feeling is that a casting would create a story that would make it more meaningful.

I have to admit to an overthink catastrophic expectation kind of thought about the MCS. Particularly about the threat of guerrilla action. Real guidance wouldn't do that. What if I'm on wild goose chase. Or more like Peru, where I had a walk-in take over part of my life, Tschiripaiya. Maybe they/it wants me to learn this language so they can "call home" as in ET. Well, baby, no one said SETI contact would be easy or without mistakes. I think if I treat it as a story, like a what-if, and take it wherever it goes, Time will tell. There is time.

Maybe I should pick a mrune by hand, express feelings of day, and do a casting to help with the story. So should I do a trial casting with the art I've got now? To see if it is even possible?

2015-10-23

Working on my mrunes. Wondering how I will do these castings. For a moment pictured them on galactic background instead of EIEnor.

Looking at the color healings I've done this year, I've got to be impressed that in the three there is a spine in each one. I'm in love. In mune, #16 is catch, which looks like the symbol for consciousness, a circle with a dot in the center. The way I drew it, the circle is enso, and doesn't meet, overlaps, so suggests a spiral. Which fits with the galactic spine channeling that came the same day as the munes.

None of the recent color healings are very pretty to an earth rainbow harmony sense. Pattern seer says that might indicate a different kind of light, maybe different tuning to Electro-Magnetic spectrum, or some other kind of spectrum altogether. Or it could be that the muning color healings would be on a spiral. Can consciousness expand from the EIEnor to a spiral spine? Or is it the spine developing from the expanded consciousness. A different kind of memory beads and incoming sensations. Maybe I'll do a new Wonder in MCSland.

Laughing with trepidation at my feelings yesterday at this time. How there wasn't anything I particularly wanted to do. Had no mission. Sometimes thinking that maybe my art life was over, that I was done. Also sometimes remembering previous lulls and how like a vacuum, way too many new projects rushed in. It is akin to reaching an emotional pit, ready for suicide, completely unconnected to any life interest. And in the pit, clarity comes, and a renewed dedication to single-minded passion. Well I've got a big bounce up here.

Runes 2 munes list: 1 signal balance, 2 prayer make, 3 buffalo lax, 4 initiation tipsy, 5 need ill, 6 evolutionary frisky, 7 open furtive, 8 Benetron hot, 9 movement cathartic, 10 hieloheal opposite, 11 Elobeing being, 12 gateway push, 13 breakthrough fear, 14 female savor, 15 chakra note, 16 spine catch, 17 priest friend, 18 manifest avuncular, 19 joy sister, 20 harvest is, 21 personal treble, 22 flow time, 23 meditation tear, 24 wholeness pulverize, 25 point dynamic is, 26 prototet trip, 27 Afrun hurl, 28 Jert ding, 29 Scrall grab, 30 Pjorn swirl, 31 drop tick.

2015-10-22

Wake at 2:20AM, search old journal for MCS indexed items. Scandalized by the nonsense of my journal. I can hardly follow it and most can not understand. I know that frequently in the past I've been so wowed reading journal that I think it should be online immediately and only my personal info holds me back. Makes me wonder if anything really is inherent in my work and all the art is in my imagination.

I'm converting the color healing program to generate with mrunes instead of rune. Making Flash graphics seems to be a huge amount of work. My curvy loose shapes don't lend themselves to that. I backed out and closed the program. Maybe I should go back to physical things. Write on the back of the ceramic rune stones would be so much easier.

So that's what I did. Chose the order that they emerged from GC on the Follow equinox spiral. Then for the last ones just the order that I drew them. I needed 6 more stones. I had a package of years-old air dry clay that was amazingly fresh. Drew the missing runesigns on them to complete the set I have.

Has to dry 24 hours so tomorrow night I should be able to do a casting. Hmm, won't have color though. Just thought of a way to do it in Flash, just write the word and give it a number. Could actually combine the runes and the munes. Really? Of course even now I could look up the counterparts in any healing. Do it manually. I just promised myself to never use a rune casting for a mune casting. It negates the spirit work. Have to keep it clean.

2015-10-18

Why should we care about galactic? Most of us care about our family members, the next door neighbor. We don't really have accurate info about our governments, the nation or the United Nations. Most of us do not know about the seasons or the moon. Bucky made the diagram using the fact that we sent a man to the moon. To get the numbers right, to calculate the time and place for each aspect of the trip, they had to know how fast and where the sun was and those numbers are with respect to the galaxy.

Mind is a crazy thing isn't it? Was trying to get a handle on why I am galaxy gal when I have no part in space missions. Maybe just put a link to Wholeo Galactic. But my thought was that the bigger picture I have about anything, the better I'm aligned with any part of it and the more peaceful I feel. Wondering if peace really is our highest value. Side thoughts about meditation. But then wandering to guns and how children are playing with them.

2015-10-14

I'm liking this graphic better but it still has a Sun roasting the earth problem. It is a good first start. But for future galactic events, I'll evolve it.

2015-10-12

This is pretty exciting. I feel like going where no cartographer has gone before. Trying to put my sun, earth and moon on the galactic spine spiraline. I could call this a spiraline calendar of celestial events. I'm planning to (note I can't say "will" since things change so fast here) do moons up to new moon 13. Then in 2016 just the solstices and equinoxes.

From a website: sarahpetrunoshamanism.com/blog/how-to-a-new-moon-intention-setting-ceremony got ideas for an Intention setting Ceremony for the new moon 11 tonight. Steps are as follow. 1. Decide what to do (my project is to develop the galactic spiralinear calendar). 2. Make a list, give it witness, write the goal (mine is to connect with an entire sphere). 3. Deliver it to the flow of the earth (I did this by burning it, returning to ether). 4. Make sure frame of mind is dream building, not fears.

At 7:07PM CDT I will be meditating with allowance to talk about my experience. I call this visionary meditation.

The farthest-out hope that springs out is to interest children in seeing this map, thinking of themselves galactically, seeing earth, moon, sun, planet cycles in context. This is inspired by local Biophilia Center, Lori, and Noni all getting children outdoors.

At new moon ceremony I read this written intention, "May I be the Galactic spine path at new moon time. Remembering, let me bring it to the graphic design to inform our sense of space time and our galactic community." I smudged and burned it.

I see a core surrounded by purple and red flowers. Cerise. Live. Raw. Ra. An EIEnor floating on water having been wafted by smoke to the galactic center. Light signals flashing. It replicates, building concentrically inward. Becoming dense. And denser. Wholeopen. Layers. Conversing with each other. It may seem tight to me in this space. But there is plenty of room between each layer. Now being centered completely. Never losing tension core of EIEnor. Expand out to a spiral path around the galaxy. Which in some mysterious way is a sphere. That I can't comprehend at this minute.

It's composed of these magnificent swirls and twirls of paths like a braided rug. The sphere might be the core. Makes a round lake or shell of black hole. A place to be. Energy intensive. You think solar is good, black holar is better. In fact, we could do that here. The center really is not a black hole. It seems like a sprinkler. Many holes, sort of shooting up like a big spray. Ah so good to be in it.

I feel like I'm getting healed. By such givers. This galactic association has so much positive energy. Keep the triangles (of EIEnor) open. Membranes. A day is like a reminder of the galactic path. A year is a reminder of the galactic path. They're treasures. The moon, from full to full, is a reminder of the galactic path. Each with its own transmission. Day. Month. Year.

Meteor Crater Spirit like Geome and these paths, were galactic path beings. Became Bodhisattva to teach us. MCS teaches beyond a year. But what is it? I guess it's the solstice connection with the galactic center as a lighter path. Twist.

I'm so grateful to be here. Wonder worthy. Wonder worth y. Wonder worth y. I feel hand chakras purple. Like birthday cake candles. Like pine trees all around. Deep ultra violet purple.

Carol Fraser was so good to me. She was a loving person. So perceptive. I wonder if I have what she had in lungs. So tight. I feel so radiantly healthy. I feel like every cell of mine is equal. Equally joyful. Such a bunch! Like a bunch of zomes, what are they zome tools? Little zomies? Just wafting out like bubbles. Like proven evanescence soar?

This December will be the birth of the MCS path. Solstice galactic path. Culminating in the full moon 13, December 25. Must consecrate. I loved our threesome: Myself, Carol Fraser, and Toni Potter. End chime song.

2015-10-11

Access granted. The making of a new evolutionary galactic spine time line. Link up with the galactic beam being spine. Hello Galaxy is a prototype of the spine movie. It has the static orbit.

2015-10-10

Into Fuller's Synergetics and Synergetics 2. Realizing that the spiralinear drawing is never explicitly explained. I might do a page to my guru who always re-inspired to see patterns. {See Galacting or Galaxying.} His patterns did not always match up perfectly. Synergetics themselves, itself is an ongoing wavi-curvi-spiralinear process. Like the Zen, going on beyond, always going.

But I found some clues and here are my interlinks. Starting with the drawing I fixed: in Syn. II 1120.34 on page 452-453 in the section Omnidirectional Typewriter. 1120.35 says, "curvi-wavi-spiralinear paths". 1133.00 worth reading. Information Control System of the Universe. Index of the word spiralinearity is on page 574 of Synergetics 2 which indexes to the figure and 520.10-12 in Synergetics I. Section 520 is on page 258 SI and is Wavelinearity: Fixes. 520.10 Spiralinearity section page 259. Section 535.20 SII is Halo. Building on page 133. Helps to explain the image. And contains the word "Galaxying" on page 134 SII.

Everything in Fuller is exciting, tempting, suggestive of finding the ultimate pattern. Galaxying search on Google has almost 10K results. First one is to a tumblr of porn. Second is to #galaxying twitters which seem to have 3 main strands: a sports team, the LA Galaxy. The Samsung Galaxy phone. Galaxy or galaxies as in astronomy. The Nassim Haramein (The Resonance Project) has video animating spiralinearity. At https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zBlAGGzup48. Thanks Jamie Janover. By the time I'd gotten it together, YouTube had rolled over to a more detailed one by djsadhu.com. What was different from what I had known is revolving clockwise around the galaxy. Always have thought we were going CCW.

Spent at least an hour researching that. Most answers say how fast the sun is going and how long it takes for an orbit. In answer to N/S most say it depends if looking from top or bottom but do say the galaxy goes CW, obviously viewing from the top, or what is top when viewed from the side. I only found one minor comment that said the solar system is going with the sun, CCW around the galaxy. That means it is going counter to the galaxy direction so is still unresolved. The picture of the sun that I saved as ecliptic vs galactic plane is in the direction I got when I studied this, about 15° from the galactic plane and pointed that way. There is a lot of interest in this but much irregularity, misleading chaotic info. Read a critique of the movies I liked. Looking at Haramein's movie, I don't feel like the earth's orbit is right so don't think I'll link to it. Unless I link to both of them as examples that don't seem to clearly picture my understanding. Another day going down the tubes.

I have a graphic succession of spirals that is working pretty well. Call it galactic spine time.

2015-10-09

Time spine. I'm fixated on this spine idea. I often just mull it over. Seeing our little tiny segment, a lifetime is just a blip on the rotation around the galaxy.

2015-10-08

I started searching on spiralinear and found an MFA thesis by Sarah Emily Richards: https://getd.libs.uga.edu/pdfs/richards_sarah_e_200805_ma.pdf. It proposes a spiralinear model of time as a slinky helix with recurring annual event vectors. It doesn't have a spiraline. See the images on page 76.

Fits right in with my thinking, except the twist should not cross itself, the section is not closed, thus the slinky is stretched out. As a 3D model, can look from one end and get concentric circles. Also the colors can go from red to violet. Also can tip the slinky with respect to earth sun and galactic plane. Seems correct in all ways.

Got mrune Hurl as a figure 8 open at the top. Also Ding, Grab, Swirl and Tick for a total of 31 mrunes.

2015-10-07

Electronics taught me so much. As an artist, I wonder how to reconcile the concepts of human spine as linear Vs. galactic spine as circular. As a technician remembering that a sine wave on a graph is a circle stretched out in time. (Note, also talked about this on 10/3 and 9/29.) This is how our planet orbits spiralinearly around the sun twirling around the galaxy. Looking at me from the side, see chakras vertically up the spine. Looking at me from above, see chakras collapsed in a circular mandala. Is it possible that our idea of time distorts our perception of space?

Be a pattern seer. The time is 11:01, which seems strangely significant and beautiful. What is the pattern? Big number : small number. The big number, 11, is almost as big as it can get, 12. The small number, 01, is almost as small as it can get, 00. They share the quality of being one step away from the extremity of their definition. Finding symmetry and common traits is fun.

2015-10-04
New favorite movie: "The Martian".
2015-10-03
Seeing a way to get the galactic path into my movie. From the moon scene fade into and turn around the galactic center to look the way it is on the Follow equinox. But make the path curved around the sun, with a dagger line for the solstices and the advance equinox way ahead. Then have my mrunes dancing on that path of my spine. So is there a spinal alignment order of the mrunes? A couple per month. Our spinal path is a circle in some ways. Do a movie of the stretched out linear path becoming a spiral segment, becoming a full circle. So what is the circle of mrunes?

Now seeing that from there the radiant lines in aura can grow out and figure can grow in while runes swarm to dot ends of lines in aura and then zoom through tan tien out to tiny radiant spokes in circle within. Wonder if this will prevent MCS sabotage. That is, does this count as doing something? Could it be that in visualizing this, I get it in body and then that is contagious in hugs and circulating with other people? And in namaste?

2015-10-02

Last night in yoga, the mrunes went tiny within. Now picturing the radiants going to a point within and past that a ways. Is the mirror fan of radiants an anchor?

So what is mune story? Only two nouns. Should structure in English? Maybe the way I drew them is the right way? I found three sentences. Trip dynamic-is pulverize tear time. Treble is sister avuncular friend catch note savor fear push. Being opposite cathartic hot furtive frisky ill lax tipsy make balance.

2015-09-30

Green Geeks, the current web host of wholeo.net says they do not support "file archiving" and my website is too big, even though I pay for an unlimited site. I have never considered my web pages as storage, but rather my art offering for publication. All my work is stored and backed up offline, including everything on wholeo.net. I know that it is a legacy site and contains HTML and file type usage over the years since 1997. But I don't have time to convert everything according to the latest fashions. I am looking for a web host that will accept wholeo.net as is for what it is.

2015-09-29

One thing I haven't really thought about much is that my distractedness is not just sickness and age. Consider this. Transformation is happening. Expanded consciousness is actually becoming part of my awareness. I'm going to have to arise to the occasion. Not just rise. I don't know how to focus it. Do I need double mental screens? One for ordinary and the other for extraordinary?

Yesterday read that Dalai Lama was at Mayo Clinic for evaluation. Then read he canceled all engagements (which were many, it is what he did) and is going back to India to rest. He is 80 years old, same as me. This was part of the expanded consciousness thinking. Nancy and I struck with pneumonia and forced to rest at the same time. I had read some preposterous suggestions and news from Aluna Joy that this equinox and series of eclipses was a time of transformation.

I feel fuzzy. Like there's something I'm not seeing. Actually this is the most important thing. I had written that about MCS language. Must be the same thing. But how can I tell if I'm evolving or devolving? Could just be Alzheimers or dementia. Well I say, make the best art of it that I can, whatever the cause. I'm interested in my munes.

If this fall (September) experience is like expanded kundalini experience, then the months to the advance equinox in March will be like bringing this awareness up a spine to the crown. I'm getting a vision of a crown of flowers, what do you call that? Not laurels. Garland lei or wreath.

Suddenly remembering the spine in Mt. Shasta and the Galaxy People was a circle. Similar to current problem "it seems there's no room for her earth center and her galaxy center at the same place". Reading on, I join circles of ascended masters, see a circle of Galaxy People, then say "the other spines will be other people". I write about sitting in circles and chanting colors of the rainbow to circulate both ways.

Now getting that I can do that each month myself (since I have never been effective in getting groups together or even communicating the idea to anyone). Say this is red. The red bug of September. October orange. November yellow, December green, January blue, February violet, March Red.

Kundalini will have reached crown. I wonder if this is just trying to legitimize my schizophrenia? If carry the analogy onward around the year, it is confusing. If the galactic path is the spine, it has a linear quality so I would think. Gosh my mind is so much faster than I can write. I'm remembering how a sine wave is a circle arranged in time. So the coming around of earth in the year is really a sine wave in its trajectory. The deviation left and right from the sun's path is so tiny that in effect it is a pretty straight line.

It would go April orange, May yellow, June green, July blue, August violet, September Red. I use the six colors, which correspond to the chakras as I first read about them in the Serpent Power. Each equinox is the balance the achievement, the end of the spine and start of the spine. The circle of people is me in different months. Has to be on or about the 21st of each month. I remember asking some group to circulate the colors. We did it but it was stilted, stumbling, unintuitive and unsatisfying. Most people do not do rainbow spectrum as routinely as they do counting numbers or reciting the alphabet.

I stood up and felt the dizziness. Tried to see it as evolution of consciousness as well as body recovering from illness. I envision a fan above my head. Can take photos of my ceiling fan. Just like that. My aura is full of flowers or mrunes spaced maybe like a foot or 6" apart in an oura (aura?) about 3 feet in radius from my body. I walk as if in a cloud of this stuff. I have no way to photograph this. Is this the message? Is expanded consciousness literally developing in an expanded aura? No space left in brain or body? Or has it been this way all along and I'm just now becoming aware of it?

About the fan, thinking migraine headaches have this pattern. Also remembering the beanie or ball cap hat that had a propeller overhead. Was it for crazies? Were propeller heads supposed to be nuts? Is being nuts really a bad thing?

Have started feeling dizzy. Think it is mitigated by realizing that it is a signal of consciousness expansion and to become aura-aware. Or is it low blood sugar or just hunger?

2015-09-28

I spied these munes: being, is, dynamic is, cathartic, opposite, sister, make, hot, treble, fear, furtive, lax, tipsy, friend, pulverize, tear, note, frisky, ill, trip, savor, push, catch, avuncular, time, balance. Wow that's a little trippy, there are 26, exactly the number of runes I had, I think? Or the number of letters in the alphabet. {Note: I drew a pictograph called a mrune for each mune.} Another word just came to me "hurl".

In the color healing (for Galactic Path Supermoon Red Bug Billboard), is a runesign for spine, that suggests the staff and chakras. What I got during yoga was that it is the galactic path we on earth are traveling with the sun, orbiting the center of the galaxy. That is the spine of our galactic expanded consciousness body.

2015-09-27

I watched Global Citizen free concert in Central Park last night. Huge crowd. Fantastic light show. Many celebrities were there saying they were global citizens. I tried to sign up but could not get validated. It is for activists anyway. I'm not really willing and able to actively fix the world's poverty. Wish we had universal/global voting.

Guidance-wise I need to see whether I can communicate with that red bug. I went to Deer Lake State Park to capture the full moon rise and lunar eclipse about three hours later. The horizon was blocked by clouds that streamed over the entire sky. I got a movie of a few rare appearances of the full moon after rising but before the eclipse. A vision came. It was of munes for the language of communicating the MCS message, like Odin spying the runes long ago.

2015-09-26

I think my task tomorrow is how to virtually connect with the moon's proximity, it's alignment with the sun and direction around the galaxy. The visual of eclipse is really just to feel the sun through the bulk of the earth at our back. So in facing the moon we are looking at the galactic path where we have been. Like being on a hay ride where the sun is pulling the earth wagon along a road called Sun Orbit. I wonder if earth, no, I know earth has some momentum of its own around galaxy, but mostly enchained or is it entrained by sun's whirl. We're on the back of the wagon feeling the pull of ahead, around, and moon around us. I actually think my inner gyroscopes might rather be here mediating, focused inward rather than outward to earth surrounds and local creatures.

This topic should have a heading such as, "Watching Full Supermoon Eclipse, Plan B". What to do when cloud cover, rain, or thunderstorms ruin plans to watch the moon rise, sun set and a glorious lunar eclipse before bedtime, from 6:30-10PM CDT? If I can't see it, I can sense it. Perform visionary meditation. Settle as you would be looking where you know the moon would rise and shine. If you can't be outdoors, sit looking in the same direction, that is East. I know where that is on the horizon from my site.

Imagine the alignment as a line from the moon to you, through you, earth and sun. It is an arrow on the sun's path around the center of the galaxy. Feel it. As you begin to meditate allow your imagination to picture what all your tiny cell clocks know, the exact time, place, speed and relative interactions between moon, you, earth, sun and the galaxy. And beyond if you go there or elsewhere. Call it insight.

2015-09-23

Slept right through the equinox which happened in the wee hours of the morning. Feeling like I am going going could be gone. Kind of fine jittered tissied.

Just reviewed a possible Facebook post that probably won't get posted. Dear Wholeo fans, I know you liked Wholeo Dome, but since you hardly look at anything else I do, I suspect mainly it was the sexy colored glass that wowed. My aesthetics, communications and concerns are of little interest. Strange to me.

Looking over my work over the years, I'm astounded at the intense beauty and deep meanings of my many and varied expressions. I'm competent in other fields. My Facebook posts are liked and even shared sometimes. I raised children and held some demanding well-paid jobs in cutting edge technology. So how can I be so different in my art perception? For fifty years I've carried on substantially unsuccessfully in the outside world while feeling ecstatically ever more successful in becoming the artist of my dreams, a creative thinker, an evolutionary adventurer and delivering visionary messages of significance. I've insulated myself from exterior judgments.

Actually any kind of feedback has been rare. Mostly I'm not ignored so much as nonexistent. So here's an invisible Hail and a silent goodbye. And if anyone reading this feels the same way, I say, I could not imagine living otherwise, it was totally worth it.

2015-09-22

Fending off tremendous distractions. Am I getting the health care that I need and what do I need? How can I maintain my increasingly legacy website while wanting to devote all to my latest and greatest mission? {She says, while typing "blockquote" which she has just read is an obsolete way to indent.}
2015-09-21
International Day of Peace. Feeling like this is a holy day. Smudged all my rooms with sage, asking for opening, cleansing, consciousness. Lit a candle and settled to meditate. Kept eyes closed but blew out the candle.

Thought about my joke suggestion to Phillip Ellis writing a 2 minute speech for Earth Justice to give to the Pope. I said, find the punchline for this: a lawyer, a yogi and the Pope went into a bar. Phillip noted that he hadn't seen this. Later I wrote that he would have to think of something funnier than this: The bartender asks, "What will you have?" The yogi says "OM". The Pope says "Peace". The lawyer says "I rest my case". Candi liked it. My early meditation wandered around that.

Meteor Crater Spirit. Incorrect to say spirits. The aspects or characteristics I found for three do just as well as aspects of the single.

I did some breathing with diaphragm and lungs, lifting and opening. I got to real meditation. So precious. Smiled, opening nostrils. Felt the melting tender vulnerable connected joy of it. And the bell rang.

In the kitchen I got that it is a creative universe. See the crater as a xmt/rcv device. See it electronically. Psychic electronics. Could see the crater as the first move in a game. I'm here, I did this. What are you going to do? That fits with my answer, which is fitting my consciousness model into it, then popping into a communication dome.

I pray for peace with my body and I ask the Meteor spirit for a message and I will do a lake2lake walk.

Seems that Grebe is a funnel funicular guy, spiraling down coil.

I'm getting a spiral that comes down into the crater like a corkscrew. What I picked up (in1992) is a remnant of consciousness. But the true xmt/rcv is down under there. So we could (or if we) put up a dome of consciousness. Collect it. Gosh it is just like a big brain. Skull. Is there a reverse of it? Maybe just a mirror image, like a lake. Earthlake. There's just as much transparency as vibes.

So that lace-like structure catches and records like storage blocks. I actually think that I did this when I was there then. This straight time aspect, I don't get. Isn't all time straight? No, in physics, Einstein has shown time is curved. Seems like now I'm revealing with awareness what has existed since I met MCS at Meteor Crater (originally Barringer Crater) in 1992. But awareness has to come for it to function with the world peace plan. World peace plan?

Get the feeling that MCS full corkscrew transponder (?) transducer (?) is working but to fully function I have to publish this news. At least make it available. What we've got is like a flower, as with fungi, the rest is underground or overground. The network is in the sky. Skycellium.

I have to get images of this guidance. Brain cell bell. Bell brain cell.

This day is not for manipulating things to be peaceful. Just noticing how things are impacted. Peace eyes.

2015-09-17
Working on the 9/11 dream contribution. Reading Wholeo Galactic, getting the idea that focusing or rooting in big picture is basis for peace. Have been wondering how to define a solo peace event for Sept. 21. Alignment reached core guidance on the solstices. On the equinox we are at the farthest extent angle away from that line. So perhaps the theme is bringing the solstice to all on earth. Connecting the lowest darkest parts of self with the center. {MCS guidance continues on September 21.}

2015-09-14

Working on Lake2Lake. About end of movie: Galactic transponder has come online. Gratitude.
2015-09-13
Suddenly I see the lake and the headhalo but is beyond that, it's like this world has gotten shrunk into the particular picture that I recorded. I'm looking at it from the outside. Like looking at a tethered balloon.
2015-09-12
I'm hearing about the shape. It is open at the bottom and closed at the top like h>V and has vibes. Open to closed is also like Elobeing. I see it more as a body or building than a mind or pattern of organization but I think I must rethink that, which is based on flowers on earth. In connectivity, there is no sacred geometry, no closed forms. Flows into nodes and out continuously. Thinking of this is a great relief to my cellular clustering. A sigh of relief. An acknowledgment. There is a sense of freedom and equality when structures of connectivity are acknowledged. Like singing we are one in the spirit and then closing down when we are Christians.

EIEnor bell consciousness model at Meteor CraterSo if we reversed the meteor crater impact shape and drew it upwards we could create a virtual building model of the message. Feeling remorseful, guilty, sad and yet unable to return to Fuller. Maybe I'm just winding down to death and not in the peak of life which is the illusion of separateness and independence.

Got this tremendous insight. What if I go to the top of the shape I drew, would it look like a circle with top at center and vibe pleats or darts or increasing folds radiating to circumference? And would it be far-fetched to see that in 3D, so the bottom could close as a phase of consciousness. So previous models like EIEnor not untrue, but just incomplete. Wow.

Reading this I can picture the round circle bell into the crater, then belling it upward from the bug with sky as background. Would that be the MCS model message?

So could an artwork movie show the EIEnor nodes as belling out at the bottom and in the process slanting to becoming vibes? I'm excited by this development.

Looking to provide a final lake2lake as maybe headhalo over map. And start a new phase of connected cosmic consciousness.

2015-09-11

Dream image: A way to talk to beingsRed dream bugDream: 2AM. I looked down and saw a little red bug, tiny, way down, crawling along. Wished I could send a message that I see you. Like put it on a signboard. I would have to know its language though. That would be the single most valuable contribution I could make. A way to talk across kinds of being.

I get a picture of an element (some kind of pixel?) Kind of like a leaf. In trying to draw it I think I've lost the last part of the dream. The element had a slightly bell shape. Maybe shaggy sharp bottom jag teeth. Some kind of alternating vibe pattern.

After waking, wondering. Did I need to contact that bug? Was my friend? Was it in a park? Is it about the MCS?

Ended antibiotic and start two new ones to finish treatment for pylori. Tinidazole and Clarithromycin are expensive. The pharmacist says that most people choose not to treat pylori..

Meanwhile, have been seeing the map with headhalos arising from the big circles and merging and eventually to just become all there is, like I am not relating to that plane. It becomes a vertical {(lake2lake)2Lake}= headhalo. No sooner having written that, put arms at sides, closed eyes, than I feel components of and headhalo action all over my body. Zaps of cons, bouncing of halos big and small, zooming like healing energy transports here and there. Actually mostly going down to ground. Feet are welcoming.

2015-09-09

Looking at yesterday's guidance from MCS, thought might be related to breathing. Breathe out impact crater. Might be related to headhalo. I will learn the MCS mission when I next walk lake2lake.

"Get Well" has a new meaning for me from this 80-year old timeslot. It used to mean "Get Better", assuming a normal OK state to be regained. Now it has become undefined and open-ended. Well is not something to get or to go to. Well is whatever it is right now. It could be being dead. It could be a last breath. It could be dancing in the moonlight. It could be life. Maybe it's like, "Get With It".

2015-09-08

Just occurred to me when I was searching for help for Mother and she declared she didn't want it, that I had more choices. She shut me down. At the time, I felt rejected, cut off, and ineffective. But I could have used it to initiate a conversation. It would elicit her fears of the situation and what she thought she would lose. She could talk about where she was at. We could imagine the various scenarios with their pros and cons. Eventually, I could engage her in the search so she didn't feel like the passive recipient. I could have helped her become the active go-getter with me as her agent. A whole fan of life that just never opened. Maybe I'm trying to do this for myself now.

Doctor's office revisit. Oxygen level is up but still have chest congestion.

Working on the color healing node spirit graphics for the Carolyoga — Just Breathing movie in Photoshop, doing Seraph, suddenly got the message that now is the time to spread whatever it is the MCS (Meteor Crater Spirit) came here for. Color healing is well and good for general development and focused therapy but there's something else, some other way to proceed. I have the elements. When I get this publishing done, must sit and receive the how. I must promise to do it or civil disobedience will occur that will be like sabotage to my well being to get me to pay attention. This is serious.

I noticed today the extreme beauty of our world, how I so enjoyed driving out of the parking lot and movement and textures and everything of interest. Why does it take deprivation or misery to bring attention down to the exquisite level? Seeing the union of the 3 MCS as in original vision. Could be as simple as an animated Gif with the shapes and colors zapping together.

2015-09-05

Started Neti pot saline solution washing of nasal passages, overcoming a childhood fear of water in my nose. The secret was breathing with my mouth.

2015-09-04

Friend goes to hospital with Afib.

2015-09-02

I keep thinking of death because I've never had a disease that is a major cause of death before.

2015-09-01

Vivid dream of a package of medicine I think is Leo's ready to go in the refrigerator. Wondering how to send it, do have to package in ice? Did we forget it at the last minute?

Diagnosed with Community-Acquired Pneumonia and Sinusitis. Started 10-day course of antibiotic: Amoxicillin and Clavulanic Acid - oral. Interesting that this drug kills unwanted bacteria in my head, lungs, and gut. That is it targets not only the current sinusitis and pneumonia but the pylori diagnosed in 2013, untreated until now. I'm wondering what good biotics will be annihilated and how that will affect me. Oxygen level is low, partially accounting for fatigue.

2015-08-30

Thinking about the question on Albert Bates' Facebook post, a summary of plants having consciousness. See Distributed Intelligence in his blog The Great Change. She asked "How do they feel about being eaten?" Intending to do visionary meditation, I held unsprouted garbanzo beans (seeds) in right hand and raw sprouted garbanzos in left hand. Tuned in.

Wood to the right. Sunlight to the left. Choral music to the left. High singing. simple or thin vibration to the right. Question was asked about communicating with plants about how they feel about being eaten. I'm first going to ask that of the right hand seeds. Over a minute pause. Focus on the changes. I see a building. Like a silo? Like a skyscraper? It's some kind of an edifice. That's what we do, above ground. The seed needs to meditate on where it came from and what its root is about.

So I'll move to the left hand to the sprouting seed. It definitely has more possibility of being eaten. How does it feel about that? -- Process-oriented. -- The sprout actually seems to feel like it eats us because its feeling of being is of its sprout growing. Any changes it has are a form of greater sprout. It exists to be going through changes on earth. It creates this shape. But it's passive in a sense of hanging on a vine. There it could be eaten or fall back down to earth and grow into a plant that has seeds. It doesn't see itself from the outside the way we see it. It sees its process of developing from what it is given, photosynthesizing and following a pattern. I guess sprouting involves branching and making roots. That's what it does when it gets eaten. So it's an adventure. Things big and small in scale are relative, not absolute. So the sprout can see itself as bigger than me, just as I think I'm bigger than it. If I see things as interactions and processes, I don't objectify them. Generally it seems like the sprout is future-oriented.

On the right hand, the seed is sort of in stasis. It got more information about where it came from. More contemplative. I go back to it and see what it says. The seed is the quintessential form. Every other part of it is changing and growing. It is like the root chakra, or the crown, it doesn't really apply. It doesn't really know about where it might go because it is still. In a sense it is in the most meditative state (of any part of its possible life cycle).

The seed and the sprout are like my kinds of meditation. Original and visionary.

2015-08-29

Am setting up for full moon 9 meditation at 1:38PM. Have an altar mandala of five sections. Looking CCW 1. garbanzo beans (seeds). 2. gong. 3. sprouted garbanzo beans (sprouts). 4. smudge shell. 5. Geome crystal.

Light candle in window align with light. Smudge healing. Gong awaken. Meditation be present.

First we light the candle in the window. Then we light the smudge. We bless the beans.

Take some seed (I took three) in right hand. Three sprouted beans in left hand. I'm taking each of these for comparison.

Meditate with me. Sprouts thee. Don't know why I'm seeing Mt. Rushmore sculpture with hippy faces with eyes closed. Pause. The sprouts seem to be smoking like smudge. The seeds have embers within. The seed hand feels lower and smaller. The sprout hand feels closer, magnified and bigger. Equalizing. Equalizing. Wind is blowing from right to left. The seeds like good parents sending good blessing to their offspring. {Note of course they aren't, what I meant was seeds encourage sprouts.} Absolutely equal. I'd say the sprouts have more pulsation like a heartbeat or breathing or some kind of reverberation. Vibration.

Oh this is interesting. The right hand is feeling lighter and the left hand is feeling darker, the same kind of lighting that I had yesterday. But the beans are switched. The sprouts though are not getting what they expected. They were expecting dirt. It's intimidating. Must keep sprouts moist. They're too dry.

When I wrote that I didn't consider the possibility that left is always darker since I'm right-handed. Always hard to distinguish personal characteristics from the subject when channeling.

2015-08-28

Thinking about sprouts. I have three kinds of garbanzo beans. Publix (standard grocery store brand), Goya (special grocery brand that has distinctly larger beans), and Organic Arrowhead Mills chickpeas (from the health food store}. Previously my experience has been that organic beans sprout the same as ordinary supermarket ones. I have thought that the difference must be in the amount and kind of chemicals that would not be in the organic ones. Would the organic have a better disposition and more love? I've been experimenting with soaking and sprouting times with the different beans.

This morning I decided to do a comparison. Took one of the dry, unsprouted beans in left hard and a sprouted bean in the right hand. Call them a seed and a sprout. At first it seemed silly. I couldn't feel either one, so light. I said to myself that I didn't want to make something up but that I encourage creative imagination.

The seed first appeared to me like a best friend or family member. Space was dark, brown, reddish tinge. The sprout opened up light. The glow fanned over and overlapped the dark left in front. So on a clock face would cover from maybe 10:30 around down to 6. However sort of stranded and beaded. The sprout seemed less available to me than the seed.

Yesterday I had a sore throat, yet drove with a very sick friend to do an errand. From then on, health has worsened.

2015-08-25

Headhalo hit spotWhen I tuned into headhalo it was spinning both ways, yes. But something, say like a dart, pierced the disk in a certain area. I don't want all the implications of saying that it is like our solar system's position in the galaxy, but it has somewhat the feel of that kind of scale and communication. Must draw. See it to the right. When I did a little pearl stepping, that's what I'm picturing, but at different angles, not stationary frontal as in diagram.

New thought while constructing lunch, singing new version of the Grateful Dead's " .. let there be songs to fill the air". Led to dancing my heart out. Goes like this, we are all connected, in meditation become the one mind. From there we have connection to one time that is all the previous nows. When experience past lives it is the ones that resonate. Not that the current consciousness really traversed such lifetimes but maybe they are the ones we choose to evolve from. I have thought I was a sacred dancer in India anciently. Or I could think that is what I wish to become. Tuning in to past human threads of it. On this note, I might formally change my direction of what I want to be when I die. Up until now I wanted to be an interpretive guide at the Akashic Records. I'm changing into being a sacred dancer. Sometimes I feel feel feel like a natural dancer of everything. Gospel truth.

2015-08-20

Beach walk early. Would like to do a drawing of the tranced bent lightninged figure with body sphere to left hip and head halo overhead. With lightnings to left center. tuned into head halo. Saw jagged lightning. Now seeing a round circle down around my hip region. Like a Grateful Dead poster, More like a moon. With the jagged stuff pointing away to my right. {Not like I remember it, that it was to the left of the figure I'm seeing.}

Seems like the headhalo is enlarging. The body sphere is smaller in relationship. It looks smaller but don't think it is. It is just of less importance to the being. The upper headhalo sort of flares and might even dent. Maybe it is like phases of consciousness. Reminds me of what's that snake that has a hood. Cobra?

Started to do pearl stepping and feeling headhalo going both ways. Or replicas appearing fast at both ways directions. Not sure if dynamic in time, or representing many "now"s at once, so more timeless in the sense of inclusive time.

2015-08-19

Pondering making the movie, "Last Least Terns of Summer". In it I follow three birds for less than two minutes. The only edits are for contrast and to eliminate shaky or fuzzy frames. Is it boring to watch a small bird walking or two birds standing, especially for repetitive steps? I like great drama, fast action and striking content. I also like observing unedited nature. The drama of the juvenile Least Tern is subtle. The bird walks, pecks, looks, veers this way and that. Seems indecisive. Finally gets close to the water but turns and runs away from a tiny wave. Maybe the significance is lost on those that don't know that to eat, terns must fly, diving into water to catch little fish. This tern has so much to learn. Or am I projecting? Perhaps this tern has a mission unknown to me. I have so much to learn about terns. Near the end of the movie, the adult tern landing is the only fast action. The content is seeing the characters and differences of these birds that were hatched in three different years.

Writing this after the facts of my experience and presenting the movie, I realize how much I bring to the movie and could have or should have put into it for other people. If I knew how to inform the action without interrupting its nature, I would have.

For me, movie making is the most difficult (to do) and potentially rewarding (to achieve) kind of art I have tried. Each frame is like a still drawing or painting. I can label them and include writing. I can surround or go into spaces to mimic the effects of sculpture, architecture or any environment. It can tell a story, inform or be for its own sake, moving visions. My creative urges for this medium range from accessing the most deeply personal far-out visions to presenting a view of nature with no intervention.

Pondering usually brings me around to views opposite the beginning. Each kind of art has its advantages. Drawings are portable and spontaneous; movies only partly so. Paintings, drawings and prints can be sold and hang on people's walls, becoming part of their everyday lives; movies depend on a platform such as computer page or screen, have a less direct commercial value, and are limited occasions in people's lives. Stained glass can last centuries interacting with cosmic light to project intense color; movies powered with electrical light are short-lived and physically feeble in comparison.

So I must say, I've enjoyed many kinds of art. Going forward, may I communicate better with movies.

2015-08-15
Vacation is over. I'm virtually back with a new moon and a rainbow going forward. The past month and a half I spent preparing for and enjoying a visit from my family. We skimmed a preview of some of the best features of 30A, Walton County, Emerald Coast, NW Florida. I'm bone weary, sun-burned peeling, morning walk and yoga deprived. But happy.

2015-07-28
Watched a meeting online of Walton County Commissioners under pressure to remove a confederate flag from a memorial flagpole by the county court house. Recently states, counties and cities across the south have been taking down these flags and putting them into museums. Fascinating to hear the incredible variety of mindsets and expressions of my neighbors. Hearing from people who were school children in 1964 that experienced the change from segregation to integration was particularly moving. I became involved in signing a petition to remove Walton County's flag. After the board's decision to do that but replace it with another confederate flag, I made many public comments. It is clear that we are far from recovering from the civil war.

2015-07-25

Honoring the Day Out of Time, walking on the beach, I increasingly became acutely aware of time. Changes always. Enjoyed beauty and revisiting it in wonderful photos and movies. Took a few symbolic shots, such as three red tomatoes for the banner of peace and my DOOT costume. I remained on the waiting list for the meditation retreat at the Magnolia Zen Center.

2015-07-24
My web host reported that I was incorrectly using my website as an archive. If I did not remove archived files they would. I responded that I had no intension to do that and explained why the site is large. In trying to understand them, I became aware that I had broken links and orphaned files that I need to clean up.

2015-07-22
I woke up at 1:30. Incessant thought and just the darn dumb urge to work. True, I work very well in the hours before dawn. Now that sunrise is uptinting sky in pinky goldnesses, I feel diminished. Something about the dark, where I feel no edges, no definition, no separateness. This glaring light of day confines me, makes me a finite object. I suppose that's why artists and dreamers close their eyes, to "make dark". It must also have a mundane meaning. In the dark, my screen is the light point. With dawn, the window is the brightest part and I constantly have to adjust to my nearer, but dimmer work station.

2015-07-20
Watched PBS POV TV show last night about Chinese diagnosis of Internet Addiction. Whole group of teen boys who drop out of school and spend their time with friends and games online. The parents and boys are imprisoned for three months and subject to psychiatric tests and therapy. Had to examine my own addiction. Can't say I'm recovering. I have many of the same ways, description as the boys.

2015-07-18
Suddenly I wondered if I got the death vision wrong. What if it were a dark lion, not a buffalo? Also the star Deneb is the tail of the swan (Cygnus constellation), where I've always seen it as the head. But Deneb is much bigger than the other stars in the triangle or our sun. And hugely farther away. What if the buffalo vision was for me, but the Leo essence is the lion? I've always wondered about the meaning of the buffalo. I got the connection from the gaze, but if Leo sent a symbol, maybe much more likely that it would be the lion. Strange that it has taken 23 years for me to get that.

Looking at a Flash movie today started me on a quest to update the Elobeing Exhibit section so more people can see it. That resulted in a movie on July 29.

2015-07-15

For two weeks I have been preparing for my family to visit in August. No walks on the beach. Not much else. Probably won't be journaling until September.

2015-07-12

I read an article entitled, "I, Racist" that more clearly defines how I benefit from being white and thus am guilty of being a racist. It is precisely the ignorance of being one that perpetuates the problem. To me the solution is to trace my authenticity in not seeing whiteness and blackness, but humbly I wait to be discredited. Honestly I don't think I see black as bad and white as good and normal, specifically white as individual and black as group.

I've spent so much of my life not liking white things. Inferior skin for example. White businessmen on Wall street so unattractive. The marriage proposals I got to military incomes and housewife roles. The meaninglessness of the term. I, racist author calls Jon Stuart white, when Jon is a Jew that has at least as long a history of oppression as so called blacks. White men oppressing all women. I have piles of denials. I see I need to learn and accept that I am a recovering racist. I am in fact in dread of racism touching my family, like other dreaded things in the water, air, and forests of Florida, compared with Northern California where I lived for 30+ years.

It dawned on me that all men are recovering sexists then. An art professor at the University of Minnesota did not throw matches at men's asses, chase them around the table, play with them in the back room or tell secrets behind their backs as he did to me and other women art students. The mother of a boyfriend did not advise his boy friends to major in home economics as she did me. When I got my Electronics Technology certificate and looked for a job, I was paid entry wages of $8 an hour. A friend's son graduated from high school and went into the same electronics program at the California junior college that I did. Half a year later, he got an entry job at the same Silicon Valley company that I did. He was paid entry wages of $13 an hour. I worked up to a better job and better wages faster than he did because I was older, knew more and had more skills. But he was on fast track to becoming an engineer where that was not available to me. The point is that I identify with victims of racism partly because I have experienced sexist discrimination at school, socially, and on the job.

2015-07-09

Drum Circle 6-8pm. Pick Nancy up at 5:40. Went and had a good time. To me, time passes without me thinking of when it would end, just continuously exploring new instruments. Basic rhythm instrument was my pair of yellow green flip flop sandals. They made a nice crack or washer board when soles slapped or rubbed together. Loved the drums and xylophone. Jamie had a huge gong that was from China and reverberated marvelously. Pat Sheewho brought many drums and is a good one. I was too tired to do anything but beat. For Nancy it was too long but she might go again sometime.

2015-07-02
The big gray cloud over the clouds marching over the Gulf waters looked like a winged Elobeing guardian. I imagined a movie with the more specific evolutionary being manifesting from this. Another vision I had was the Elobeing banners as wavy-edged overlapping, then wrapping around me, interwoven, left and right, like palm tree trunks. Should draw them (see link to wavy for animation).

2015-07-01

Full moon 7 day. Intrepid galactic moon stalker report. Up at 2:30AM. The energy a high-strung tension wire zinging. It is like a carrier wave. For me this experience indescribable (but of course will try to describe). Like a solid space where everything equally charged but now in XMT mode.

Weather channel shows a storm out in the gulf approaching my site. I would have to leave long before moonset if had any chance of seeing it. I went out and got marvelous movies but now sky is completely overcast.

I am aware of the tradition of this being galaxy people contact. It feels like I'm like a microorganism or a cell in a larger body with energies on gigantic scale telling some story in which I like every consciousness is a participant. But since I'm such a minuscule part of it, how can I visualize the whole? I was going to write "there is no way that I can visualize the whole" but it wasn't true. Isn't true. There is a way for a part to visualize the whole. Darling word processing OpenOffice Writer suggests that I visualize the wholeo.net.

Briefly state what I liked about the video of full moon before stormy moonset. Cricket, caa caa, and thunder sounds. Lightning flash. Moon mystically coming into and out of focus. Beautiful colors ending in blue as moon increasingly clouded over.

Sitting in chair with Geome over heart, visions came. An eye of profile head on left is eyelashes, blue light. Perhaps a solid shaft as I move Geome. Geome over tan tien gut a spiraling like many whelk shell cores, wide fluted spirals in to narrow shaft, strung continuously with many. Bronze or copper edge, gold body, silver inner connecting coils. That or this is quite impressive. Slant the string along grass/path diagonal. Galaxy people personalities seeding earth biota, biotics, biological organisms. Maybe two strings like DNA and what's the other one? MXX, mRNA, mitochondria? The second string is more like lily blossoms on a green stem tapering white or pearly funnel opening to orchid outer edges of petals.

2015-06-30

I think I have a guardian Elobeing. Moves like jellyfish flex their legs or people swimming do a kick and the banners all stream together. It's going straight up and then kind of in recognition, comes down banners flexed puts a couple around me, like I'm under their wing. I appreciate that. I keep wondering. I keep seeing physical characteristics. What about the social characteristics?

Wondering how involved I should get in protecting the beach. My guardian Elobeing shows with octopus-like head on top and wraps banners or should say drapes over my face, leaving left eye to see with. I get a message that is the fuzzy eye so beach activity is not relatively important. Then I wonder about the "head". Somehow that relates to the experience I recorded where the headhalo disk came down into me and merged. I get that is how the Elobeing head works. Expands for channeling actions.

2015-06-29

I am mutating. I hope people will see me mutated some day. Hilarious if anyone ever reads this and says poor demented dear, died like any other. To which I say that entertaining these visions is entertaining. Saves the price of going out, buying books, and seeing movies of other people's entertainments. I spoke into camera often on 40-minute walk. Also drew in my little book. Good to know I can walk and draw.

I got side-tracked by deciding to pin an image of Tweezle-Wootz on Mutate by Walt Whitman page to Pinterest Transparent Arts board. I read it again and see how it has guided, inspired and thrilled my entire life. Of course Whitman is a poet and meaning is in the eye/mind of the beholder so I can't be sure that what I'm getting out of it is what Whitman thought was there. Of course 2, is that artists channel and are really no more authorities on the meaning of their work than anyone else. To me it feels like our channels are so close that we're channeling the same thing.

Started pearl step. Immediately felt like original Elobeing. I don't remember what the thin plumes coming from the top are. But the sponges somehow are what connects, like rhizines I guess. They don't connect, they communicate. Is it about evolving, maturing? From a potential to participatory? Responsible and yet vulnerable? Communicate with the pearls and the roots. Whatever went down. Pearls. I feel like I'm becoming this creature that I desired. Whatever you design is what you become.

Along the edges of the banners I'm seeing the little borders have circles and the larger circles within. Wonder what that means? Seems that came up for the walk, that was part of the dream, the pearl dream too. Then suddenly I felt like I could go side-wise sideways, putting the banners all lined up and just sort of scooting sideways. Straight.

It's like parts of the design are starting to function. The sponges are flexing holes. The sponges are opening and closing so much like a secreter? Sequencer? Sea creature. Little ruffles skirting up the strings of the pearls (?) The ruffled edges spiral pleated ruffle with little ruffles on the edge and little balls on the end of that. I should get my drawing book. This has to be drawn.

I'm in the deep end and it's UP.

Seems like the tubing follows that design too. I can just see ?? tubing eye is with thick walls. Little balls are rolling along in that. Larger balls in the center. The whole thing is flexing and moving ribs side by side smaller and larger. It's a dynamic thing.

ElobeCaroling? As I remember, the ribs of the torus came together, vertically. The whole thing did not flatten down. Like a small slinky. The torus sort of flattened out into a circle the banners twist into a stem, like a disk on a pole.

The circle flips its head down and with accordion folding down to the bottom of the banners. Or just wraps down the banners. Then is just a circle on the ground. Something about pearl step. Wow, it is a morphing creature. From there, it can grow roots or send out pulses in root patterns and hop along this path. This is preposterous. I need Neil Gaiman to draw me a graphic novel .

2015-06-28

Thinking about pearl step pearl pearl step. And overhead discs, headhalos, saw them dck, dck, dck, dck, dck, dck, dck, around a torus coils. Then it seems like the first time I felt banners down around my body. Like I was dancing. Felt so good. Actually felt real.

My grandson called to say thanks for the videos I made. I could not understand him due to my hearing loss. When we switched from phone to FaceTime, I could understand perfectly.

2015-06-27

Working away in Photoshop. Suddenly a vision, a visitation of Steven Gaskin. He says the Garden is the Farm future. Oh I wish I had recorded this, seemed so clear at the time. He's looking like that actor in Lord of the Rings, the headmaster of Hogwarts the school of wizardry in the magic books. But that is just for recognition. We breathe like as if tokes of weed but it is for joy camaraderie and high being. We thank each other for our interaction. Me for donating Wholeo Dome. Him for accepting and for the work of his son and his wife and all his friends and people at The Farm. He says the eating of food from Farm gardens is important also the benevolent thoughts during that assimilation and greeting of life forms. I think back to the early 1970s when I went west on a lone mission and he came east on a communal mission. Wrapped America and then he went south with Plenty and I went south to Lake Titicaca.

This is his message: The Farm Ladder. Say there are 13 rungs of evolution of consciousness. See the whole ladder. No matter what situation. No matter who you meet. No matter what you are doing. See where it is on the ladder and envision up, the next rung. So many people today have been blinded, pushed, manipulated, coerced, tempted and mis-informed so they have lost loft. Maybe even fallen to the bottom of the ladder. Be a way-shower. Show the next rung. Just accept the position you see without judgment while radiating the next level. Make it continuous like colors in a rainbow. Oops Caroling is seeping into this guidance. If level is red, so ever-so minutely to orange vibration. Always gradually higher frequency. This is reiki love spiritual healing. Channeling energy does no harm.

I sent this to Friends of the Farm TN group on Facebook.

2015-06-25

Saw the snowy plover chick and adult male together on the beach again. There was a false crawl surrounded by footprints that possibly caused the turtle to loop twice but make no nest.

I started placing images of the last six full moon rises and sets on a single view of the horizon as seen from the ramp in Deer Lake State Park. It is exceedingly difficult.

2015-06-24

Every day on the computer something happens that is irrational, unexpected, and out of my control. Today, suddenly, all the tabs in the browser were in characters, perhaps Chinese. Had to restart browser. In uploading web pages, all but one were fine, matched the local files. One would not update. I tried with Chrome and Safari, linking from wholeo.net and the online video sites. I had to shut down, reset my modem web connection, re-save and reload the page. I feel victimized but never know if I'm being hacked, my software is corrupted, I hit a wrong link, or what looks like disaster to me is actually intended to be a feature.

2015-06-22

Woke at 3:39 with smoke detector chirping. Replaced battery. Out at 5. Turtle watcher striding along. Observed that the new ordinance saying all trash will be picked up each night has not prevented two rickety frames near the beach access and chairs scattered here and there. Two in DLSP. Heard terns before got to inoutfall. Light is off on the house but another porch light on farther east. Then a huge flock of 20-30 birds wheeling overhead. They tolerate the heron fishing the gulf with a couple of swipes that made the heron duck.

Saw my first snowy chick. As looked at video, saw that it hid under the adult's wing. They stayed in a depression in the sand until I left. I posted the pictures to Facebook and became friends with Raya, the biologist that put the bands on the bird two weeks ago. She was amazed that the chick has survived. There were two chicks in the one snowy plover nest in Deer Lake State Park.

Read "The Fountain of Youth" by Peter Kelder, which Nancy had copied and printed. Got some good laughs. Agree with and contingently practice most in the book with yoga. She calls the exercises the Five Tibetans. Don't like the wrist bending and pressure. Least liked thing is not mixing foods. Especially starch and protein, like bread and cheese. Spinning only to the right is suspect too. In fact my suspicion is that is used to suppress women and feminine energy in men. Whenever I hear "left over right" I think to follow it with "right over left" which makes a good square knot. The book is overly motivational, like "win friends and influence people." It so reminded me of the "Secret of the Andes".

2015-06-21

Wonderful morning of sunrise meditation followed by yoga at Blessings Beach. On way back from beach devised these goals. Make an altar to the solstice and yoga day. Meditate 11:38-12. The altar prep involves smudging and healing energy so start earlier after shower.

The other idea replaces the labyrinth at the church. Just don't feel like being out in traffic or causing more traffic. Besides the replacement is something I've entertained by making a map of lake to lake and thinking about making a finger labyrinth of it. I could also devise a room-size, paint on sheet or outline with objects.

Visions of the day were scanty but solid and powerful. Felt galactic electric headhalo as a channel from sun to galactic center. What I have is RCV and XMT filter. Like being part of a drum circle. Listening and expressing. Take and give. In and out. Called it a watch. It reminds me of grandpa's watch. Also Apple watch.

Watch headhalo. See the movie. There is the possibility that the headhalo is a transcender, a way to someday ascend and be that. Not this. My usual experience of transcendence is bliss, intensity, love, buoyancy, non-objectivity, just being present. I have felt tethered but I do not know what it would be to separate from Caroling the embodied person.

Cooked over half of the mung bean sprouts. Skimmed off a lot of hulls and poured off soupy looking cooking water. The 3HO recipe has great reason for the food and solstice background. I pinned it, 3HO history page that has a picture of the retreat we visited in 1972, and a page describing the solstice diet with menu of three meals. I didn't have beets and carrots so substituted green peas, celery, and cauliflower, lightly cooked. At the end I added sprouted sunflower seed meal, tahini made with sprouted black sesame seeds, pecans, portebello mushroom, butter, and shaved Parmesan cheese. Quite delicious.

2015-06-19

Sprouting Mung beans and brown rice for the Inner Solstice on June 21. After sunset over Eastern Lake, I saw earthshine on the crescent moon near bright Venus and Jupiter.

2015-06-17

Thinking I could make a shish ka bob, that is skewered set of the storyboard showing the lineup from sun to GC from above instead of beyond. But really in my conception, the path is from linear to circular. That is, GC is not over there, it is in here. Well, I could have it be a surround. Show going from feeling separate, scalar, local, momentary to feeling connected or connectionless, pan-local, infinite and timeless. Maybe it could be in the movie. Ah I love it when I think of something that must be done but I can logically put it off.

Picky point: about wing nuts, AKA wingnuts. Most of my life I've loved wing nuts, the hardware nuts with little tabs to facilitate attachments with bolts. During these years I have participated in the fuzzy definition of nut to include good food, hardware mate of a bolt, and crazy people. Only recently has the definition of wingnut extended a benignly deranged nut into a politically dangerous person. I guess it follows but I wish to affirm my love of the hardware kind.

2015-06-16

Sat in meditation for New Moon 7 at 9:08AM CDT. Tweezle wootz transmission. It's new moon time and tweezle wootz are broadcasting. I saw (envisioned) the dark moon in front of the bright sun and radiating circles coming out from the center of the moon with segments of color in them. I wish I could decode that like different arcs of centrifugal lines, no, concentric. Equal in radius out but cut off in different angles from the center. I could draw this.

It's the tweezle wootz and they're sending messages. It's from the center of the radius to the.. . The center dark of the moon lined up and then the outer edge of the moon. Whoa, wow there are the tiny going-counter-clockwise, radiating arcs out with tiny rainbows in the them. I see them as fringes curving with the spin, although the message disk itself is not spinning. Ah, the vibrations are incredible. This feeling of love. Dynamic love. Love as an action. Pause. That's like a key, a term for mystic thing that I'm in that has no description.

Towards end knee hurting, moved to kneeling position. When see radiant UV blue fragments, I know I'm mentally aligned right. It feels like a physically moving position but it is a mental action. At the end placed hands together with edges and fingertips touching, not palm centers. Fingers are rounded and wrists at a greater angle. Knuckles away from the ones on the other hand. I can't remember why. Maybe to honor round transmission.

2015-06-13

On sunrise beachwalk, hugh 6' waves and water way inland. Wrack line maybe 12' or 4m from the dunes. I had a splinter last night and couldn't get the hurt part out of my toe. Since had just read Florida Health Department warning to avoid flesh-eating bacteria, am trying to avoid water. Had to wade part of the inoutfall. So much garbage. I got a big bag and dragged a chair and umbrella to the trash at the end.

The least terns dive-bombed me all the way along their colony, the western edge of blessings beach. This not only scared me but I was so sorry to cause them such distress. Not one but maybe all of them circling and chirping loudly at me. I'm in touch with Bonnie Samuelson, the Audubon overseer of shorebirds in our area. Later she had Fish and Wildlife biologists install yellow traffic signs picturing a bird, labeled "Bird Xing".

One drama was when first got to inoutfall, water streaming inland carrying a small turtle. At first I thought hatchling, then realized it was bigger, maybe 5" shell. The left flipper was twice as big as the right so I thought was wounded. Would have called turtle watchers but they were way ahead east. How can people walk so fast? Makes me wonder if I'm just crawling along. Tried to get a picture but the current swept the turtle under big patch of foamy wrack seaweed. Maybe it was a crab?

2015-06-12

Art thoughts. Disk over head. Headhalo has got zaps of lightning and stuff in it. Seeing them starting on outer edge, the rim, and zapping toward the center. I need to create galactic Wholeo logo, whologo. Remember where those images came from and what they mean. I need to intend that. Like a wind sock. As the earth moves … we have this acceleration. It's not for me. I don't have to be facing in that direction of rotation. But for the earth it is an acceleration. The speed of movement of the earth planet accelerates anything on it or any smaller motion on it. That's going in one side and out the other. Constant channeling of the headhalo disk. Increasingly I seem to be able to bubble it out. Animate that in 3D. About the ability to transcend into this sphere of headhalo, not in Caroling's body.

Our lifetime here could be like one pearl step in some larger life doing.

So many visual tools are available, but on and in this culture of earth most of my life has not been using those tools. I look towards using those tools. It feels like being a way shower. There are others of course. We are all way-showers to each other. The amount of visual aids that I have is incredible. So it should help in seeing.

2015-06-09

Mentally, if not physically, grazed by lightning. I was on my computer, working on this blog, making a link to the connector page, when ZAP. I saw, heard, and felt a brilliant lightning strike close to my window. Electrified aura! Was I hit? Killed? I touched something to test being alive. The computer was still on, nothing was broken or in flames. I disconnected electronics, smudged with sage and meditated, feeling completely irradiated, crying. I must ground each and every cell with this neon ultraviolet pale orchid aura. All connected. I just feel connected to everything that has ever been struck. Seems like I'm crying for the human feeling of being struck. And everyone who has ever felt that. A song came to me: "Wave after wave of love all around me. Give me the strength to go on."

2015-06-08

On beach walk in DLSP at dawn, from the top of the ramp I photographed the day-before last quarter moon. As I came down the ramp I saw a small turtle track coming right up to the dune beside the stairs. Got all excited. I can't tell if it is a nest but could be a false crawl.

Followed the track back to the vehicle ruts in the sand where it really seemed to end. Wondering why the track did not go to the water. The turtle watch volunteer looked and continuing to walk east, called Bobby, the overseer. I don't know what they found.

I did a lot of pearl walking. Seem to be puzzled by this disk over head that is not a sphere. Is flat and turns with my head. Seems to have Tibetan flames around the edge. Maybe a circle at the edge with the flames fringing out. In computer graphics I could make the headhalo disk or what ever it is overhead as 3D in Photoshop and then it could be moved in 3D. As extrusion because it is rather flat, not a sphere, and tilts and tips as I turn my head. Reminded of Stargate, the science fiction gate to invisible travel.

Later at home, I stepped to middle of room. Paused and felt the disk overhead. (This image has evolved from the moon-like vision of 6-02.) It enlarged. (I edit out the "kind of" before "enlarged" in effort to be more direct. But it never is really clear that the word is right.) The disk sort of descended over to envelope or merge with me. As it did so, I gradually lost touch with being able to visualize it. Felt good though.

Have got to have a better plan for next six months of mooning. One idea is to do my rise and set horizon graphics with moons that I saw in their closest proximity to the horizon. I will have just 4 on each one, right? (See table.) Maybe if I do that I can get a sense of what would make it more interesting. One thing possible is to get the arc ot the videos of the estimates, which I then could interpolate or guess at how the arc would extend to the horizon and put in dotted path and dotted moon shape there. Question is whether the arcs would be on the graphic? If so, would it then be necessary to do the arcs for the good ones too?

2015-06-07

Suddenly thinking of my mom (when I was a child) at the dinner table drinking her glass of water. A pleasant moment for her with family home and meal accomplished. A moment of refreshment. I can feel her gratitude and appreciation for the water. And I feel the same way.

Took a little nap and am just feeling like a radiant jewel of creation. Not feeling grateful, because that seems to create an interface between me and IT. Grateful implies special treatment. Kind of groveling for favors. I don't feel separate enough from my joy to know there is anything else. Feels just burgeoning. Feels mirthful. Feels exuding. Feels like the expanding universe.

2015-06-06

National Trails Day hike with Florida Trail in the new unfinished Choctawhatchee River Section. Enjoyed it for two miles until I got so hot and tired I thought I might faint. Tom was at the halfway point with truck and gatorade to drive me back to my car. See video including alligator-like sounds.

2015-06-05

Watched a TV interview of an olympic athlete who is transgender. Bruce seems to think that being a woman is lacy dresses and makeup. That conflicts with my feeling that being a person is more important than being a gender. If some of my features are true because I'm a woman, that's fine, but I don't need to define that or have it defined. Maybe working in computer industry, where job was same for genders promoted that. So I will watch the next installment, but for me Bruce Jenner seems pretty superficial. Maybe the key turned when he says he has the soul of a woman. Oxymoron. If I have a soul, understood as my spiritual nature, it is not related to sex. The best way for me to understand Bruce is that he is attracted to femininity and is on an adventure to become it.

Another thing on my mind is the difference between gassho and namaste. That is, as defined at events I attended recently. I realized that I was much happier with the prayer pose defined as union in yoga than defined as thank you as in gassho.

2015-06-04

At meditation vision about lake2lake pearl stepping. Where the roots and pearl were all in me. The moon over my head is turning into quite a portal. I can't remember specifics. But I do remember the roots straightening out coming up like a fringe. Pointing up at the moon. (Like wavy fingers of an afro comb.) But there was this space in between the root tips and the moon.

Table of recording rises and sets for the first 6 full moons of the year.

  01/04/15 02/03/15 03/05/15 04/04/15 05/03/15 06/02/15
moonrise no no estimate good estimate estimate
moonset good estimate no no good estimate

Goals for next 6. Get a good single shot of moonrise extent and moonset extent. At the end of the year, plot the moons that could be located on them, the estimates just where they appeared.

2015-06-03

Just realized that this whole lake2lake series is based on walking. Could imagine a visual for finger walking it, like tracing labyrinth with finger. Maybe that one I'm doing now on the drawing trace over the map. Instead of a circle, is back and forth. Use left hand to come back. Promotes balance. Wonder if I can find that graphic of walking fingers from ATT long ago. Let your fingers do the walking was the slogan I've long remembered. I seem to also be planning for how I'll continue this work if I can't walk for some reason or am on deathbed.

Working away, packing my lake2lake page with images, links, trying to express the richness, context and history of these brief movies. Trying to make sense of visions. Suddenly seems so bejeweled, ornate, baroque, over-embroidered, heavy, syrupy. I pray to do it eventually so simply, so Matisse, so direct and expressive without explanation.

2015-06-02

Full moon 6. Morning plan: Alarm: 4AM. Leave home - 4:30. Moonset 5:49. Evening plan: Leave home at 7PM. Moonrise 7:46. Sunrise and sunset were very close to moonset and moonrise.

As I was walking down, I was feeling the root pearl person outline totally. I felt those little "con" lightnings coming out of the top of my head. Walking along, sort of lacy pearly thingie. Then these little sparks coming out, whatever that means. I have to say I'm very happy to be out here though.

Later, walking back, the overhead became a moon.

2015-06-01

On walk (about pearl step visions) very tight core, kind of rectangular top and bottom, just a quick transfer (of direction). Each pearl-step (footstep) has both mesh roots and pearl. The (underground or underfoot) network is getting developed, spreading out, not going more completely down.

Later when I tuned in, it seemed like I had gotten so much toward the downward roots, that it spread up into me. I was a pearly-rooted person.

I'm preparing to soak all my hiking clothes in Permethrin to fend off bugs, mainly ticks and mosquitoes that spread disease.

2015-05-31

Went to a yoga event at a new venue near me. 108 yogis, a benefit for earthquake victims in Nepal. My favorite pose was when side-by-side, we put arms on each other's back. Then did tree position, with one knee bent resting above the other knee, so balancing on one leg. It was such a feeling of mutual support and interconnectedness. We did the other leg. Then each leg raised in front, then in back. I would love to do more group yoga like that.

2015-05-30

clear vase with flub footOn walk when I tuned into my vibe I saw flowing energy coming up, not waves. Just flowing straight up like that vase I've got. Going up is like a pile driver. It is a continuous flow. Flows up, the next flow pushes that flow up. And out of sight or actually around the torus.

I'm doing pearl step. (Calling the vase parts the flub at the bottom and the channel stem.) Flub at the bottom and the channel straight up. It gets narrower and narrower as I just focus. I follow the ones that go up. It has to get narrower so it can go straight up. Flub is just around the feet and the ground. Pile drives up and splurts out the top. The wider it can go at the top, the wider it can go at the bottom. So it must be a glassy torus sort of thing. I'm loving it. Never knew it existed. Spreading it out at the top might be new for me.

Strangely enough, it never becomes a real torus. It is just a skinny torus core. Seems like I can go up and try and spread out (like twisting something and the top flares out) More like I'm twisting a straw, torquing

2015-05-29

Had some pearl-stepping thoughts. Took text from a movie on beach walk the day I got the h2V inspiration (4/14). "Thinking about translation. And always receiving and sending out vertical spiritual energies translated to horizontal earth energies. Suddenly, in this fog, I thought, why not horizontal to vertical. I seem to be an incredibly horizontal person." The white fog could be the background and the v2h and h2v directions animated behind the scrolling text. And maybe the horizontal person could introduce the splurt energies and the up imagery. This is sort of like Access Granted, the video about the video coming first and then the actual video.

Have started v2h<->h2v sequence.

Saw the movie "San Andreas" after a toast to having lived in California for 33 years, blessed that I had not been in the kind of earthquake in the movie. Now in the path of hurricanes, but at least there is a warning system.

2015-05-27

At 8:17AM my computer just went black. A few minutes later the lights on. It wasn't just a computer thing because the modem had to restart. But none of the other circuits in the house seem to have been affected. Have lost train of thought though. Lost everything I had put in the blog. Use this memory to understand what happens in an unexpected accident. The mind either is unable to hold onto the current contents or the links to them are broken or obscured. Maybe tests our bandwidth.

Thinking about that train accident where the train was speeding, but the conductor had no memory of the entire event or what led up to it. I wonder if the first responder's attitude affects that. If someone comes at you saying you just killed people and wrecked your train, what happened? Seems like that would produce fear and guilt and emphasize the need to self-protect, shut down, withdraw, build shell. If someone expressed care for your well-being, seems like that would help. Now what did I do for my train of thought? In between, blank. Now to rebuild my blog. Which causes me to want to escape. Same thing that used to lead to smoking a cigarette.

2015-05-25

Memorial Day is the first quarter of the moon. I had planned to go to the ramp site at sunset and see if the moon is high in the sky, but it was too cloudy. First quarter time was 12:19PM CDT. I'd love to work on my movie. Need to do one with an up. Ups are connectors and splurts. Looking at pearls imagery rich with the twigs mycelium below, wondering what the ups would look like. Thinking that the ups could be a splurted version of what is below. What is below is looking like it is there and being revealed, spotlighted by the steps. And splurting is projecting what has been envisioned.

I've been rereading the journal and whacked out absorbed shocked at the depth of my psychic involvement in Mel Geary's transition. Beautiful unpublished writing. Tempted to scrap lake2lake and make pages of spiritual healing example. So pithy. Not sure how or if connects to me now. Yes it is partially in my notes on Fire the Grid.

Getting distracted by forming a whole new view of my lifetime historical context. I was born in 1930s and I think I am a communist at core and at heart. It seems so many of our problems are caused by the profit motive, doing things for money, not love. It seems like I was a sprout of a vision of loving equality and belief in goodness of people that resulted in the New Deal, capitalists paying high taxes and being subject to workers demands and needs. Education became important and subsidized by rich people. Maybe partly because the depression lowered a lot of the riches and they needed the masses to help them build up their capital again. What is a capital in structure? It is the decoration at the top of the supporting column? At the roof. So gradually the rich have become richer and more powerful and are sucking as much profit from the masses as possible. I have to see all the benefits I received that encouraged free expansion of consciousness as being like fertilizer, so the rich could harvest a better crop. Under our social system the masses have increasingly less control. It was no better under communist rule. I do not have the perspective to know if this is part of some cosmic setup, a natural order of competitiveness or if we really could do, or could have done better. I know in my heart I feel this wellspring that we can or someone sometime somewhere could do it.

This channel is fired but on edge of burn out. I try to firm up, to flesh out, to present a previous vision and get 25 more. It is not fair. O yes it is but becoming more than I can bear. No don't stop, it is just that I am almost overcome with the knowing that there is no end. Always going on beyond. I'm crying with joy and terror at the impossibility of my life. How to accept just being a bud plant. Never really flowered.

Late afternoon, sudden carpal tunnel or thumb problem. It hurts all the time, sometimes worse when typing or using track pad. Maybe arthritis? Pain is debilitating. Pain is a drain. {Note, this was gone the next day.}

2015-05-22

The color "pearl" has a hex value: #EAE0C8. I wonder how it would look as the background to this page. The word "pearl" to me evokes a soft, lustrous, deep glow as if illuminated from within, somehow embodying all the colors of white light. I must make amends.
Pearl Color

What is the nature of pearls that is so deep? Lustrous. Don't have any particular colors of their own. But they seem deeply rich and light. I guess it is the layers. Research finds in addition to the body color, there are two kinds of layers, the overtone and the orient.

At ECMS last night, Anne Hornstein had created a 7-circuit labyrinth. Walking it, my inner radiance, joy, rapture kept increasing. Found a pace faster than the Zen slow walk but slower than normal that seemed just right for meditation walk. Thought a little about pearl walk. Other people dropped out until I was the only one walking. Finally I got to the center. Then kind of leap flew ran around the course on the way out. Trying to think of a way to integrate this practice into my life. Although the group meditation might have had unknown part in the high.

2015-05-20

OK, Caroling stop this pondering. Task at hand. Continue the evolutionary thread that inspired and drove your parents. It is actually simple at the core. Roots deep in earth. Sprouts far into lala land out there, UP. Finding center core of torus. Today is a wakeup dream video to do. It is a preview, to be improved.

2015-05-19

Brocade. Thinking of new alternate rhythm to pearl step. Pearl step (step is down root spike), Pearl, Pearl step (step is up flash spike).

2015-05-18

Working on birthday card videos for three grandchildren. Also exploring an iPad and iCloud. On beach walks some days seeing endangered birds (snowy plovers and least terns). Seeing someone come out off of the WaterSound West ramp into Deer Lake State Park (where dogs often roam free in spite of leash laws) and wondering if it was a dog off leash. Seeing that it was just a big man, thinking I am overdoing my dog-off-leash paranoia. Alternatively, maybe I'm really thinking like a bird. At home, stopping to water plants, I got two nasty yellow fly bites.

2015-05-16

I'm hearing pearl STEP pearl pearl STEP (where step is the high loud tone). Seems like the psychic pile drivers have come up with something that is now streaming up. I see it streaming three paths, double tracks bubbly. About the teaching of that tiny white twisty shell I examined. Look how it grows and how it is shaped. That's time and space. Fractals and Humvees?

2015-05-13

Up at 3:30AM. Saw cells as radiant daisy shapes. Yellow centers with white petals. Concentric energies coming and going. Recurring in morning. Felt light and relaxed in body. It is mind that seethes.

Saw splurt as pearls coming into each spiral in the curl and traversing upwards to the point. In double track paths, as in liquid starlight juice paths. It could be that the starlight travels the splurt powering planted pearls upward. Now seeing the energy could come from foot contacts, ball and heel. But the pearl image or totem or aspect or artifact or transcender goes straight up from where planted.

This is quite different from ... ah, maybe this is the resolution. The streaming along splurt outline could still be starlight energy, cosmic juices transformed, which energize the pearls. So I saw the pearls reflected in the drops, like rainbows in dew drops. Not inherent pearls but reflected image or refracted pearllight. Pearlight. Pearl light.

2015-05-12

Thinking of my pearl step movie. How to make a point. Thinking of the connector zap overhead going up. Also that overhead doesn't have to be the same, it can vary. Then that in experience it is a repeating pattern. The movie should be a rhythm of repeating patterns. Like a poem. I can develop these modules separately and then compose with them. Within a module, there can be a great deal of similarity and repetition. So the story develops like with different shapes and colors of Lego bricks.

Found some alternative ways to chant pearl-step, pearl pearl-step. pearl-step, pearl pearl-step.

2015-05-11

Moon watching. This morning I saw just where the moon is when exactly at the last quarter at 5:38AM (in May) from my favorite perch over the dunes between Gulf and forest in Deer Lake State Park, Florida. Down on the beach four or five snowy plovers. One not banded yet. These rare birds get scared away by fox, coyote, and dogs. They run as fast as my video camera = 30 steps/frames per second. Then stop to look around.

2015-05-09

Hike. Thinking of Blessings Beach and modifying the Walking Meditation song. Mind sending a thousand blessings, on this lovely path in peace, with each step, a pearl is planted. I saw the pearls going down along the previous mycelium. Instead of staying on the surface, going down where the first one was. Incremental. Sort of like a pile driver, pushing down pilings farther and farther. Creating this multi-storied lace of pearls. It's not just on the top. Not a lace, lace is seeing it from the side. It's a net, 3-D net. Like cosmic juices in earth.

On my walk today, encountering snowy plovers on the beach.

2015-05-08

Pearl-step, pearl pearl-step. Why pearl? Instantly remembering that page from On the Way to Machu Picchu that has all the ea words: REASON IDEA CREATE REALIZE TEAM MEANING HEALTH FEAR STEADY YEAST TEACH EASY PEARL SEANCE REACH EAGLE FEAST PLEASE EARLY LEAP HEAL BEAM FEATHER GLEAM REVEAL NUCLEAR HEAD READY HEART EARTH GREAT THEA OCEAN BREAST HEAVEN. Ea is a spirit of the first 40 spirtual steps on the trip in 1980.

Hiking in Pt. Washington State Forest, wonderful dew drops in the grass. Rainbow-zapped sparkles reminded me of diamonds. You can buy a few stones with these colors and behaviors that have been ripped from the ground far away. But even adorning celebrities on red carpets with whole mountains destroyed for the gems, there never could be the fresh wet airy variety and quantity of these liquid gems of light.

Wow, sometimes progress just zooms. I get the walking video into lake2lake and realized why they are part of the same. Ah, walking started out as an example of horizontal to vertical. Hmm, just thought of contradiction. Instantly resolved. Horizontal is the step or should I say stride. It seems that step is picking up leg/foot, moving forward, and lowering leg/foot, the whole thing. I'm thinking of the advance as horizontal and when the foot comes down, pearl is planted. But there is also a vertical energy, could be splurt.

About pearl in motion. When putting foot down, a pearl sinks into earth and sends roots of vibration. I think it remains. That is it is not like a song or call. It is a psychic structure. Not sure how lasting it might be, but it is intended to be sort of out of time? Part of a spiritual nature web or culture. So in the video each one appears when the foot goes down, and zaps out roots.

2015-05-07

The ECMS meeting presentation was cancelled and the topic became a discussion on Mindfulness. I cannot go. All I can think of is "Mu" and do not want to hear the discussion. That is, what I could hear, since I can't hear many people's fast, quiet speech. It drives my brain into snarl that cannot be resolved.

2015-05-05

When doing morning balance-with-closed-eyes routine, first stand qi gong. Bent knees, feet aligned under hip joints, arms slighted belled, center in tan tien (hara), poised to move in any direction. Rise on toes and hold. Try five times. Picture each foot as fitting into a box. Feel the stability of each corner. Try standing on toes of one foot. Try 5 times. Same with other foot. Try 5 times.

On a lake2lake walk I am in a pearl-step mode. Thinking of here and Peru, eagle and condor, horizontal and vertical energies. Planting pearl step, pearl, pearl, step. It seems like I can feel the pearl energies, like mycelium, blooming in the ground.

With 365 days in a year, if I did 360 days, it would be like a year of time and a circle of shape. Instead of time and space, let's call it time and shape. Vector, relative space. That would be what we creatures are familiar with. I could plot something on it (like a chart or graph). Maybe I could look over the year and see which days I have walked on here and fill in the days (looking over all the years that I've been here). It could be either beach or 30A, so there are many summer days that I've walked lake to lake that count. Actually, it's not lake to lake when I start at Beachfront. That would be interesting, a calendar of days that are the same over time, over several years. I could start with a day out of time, so then I would have 364 days. That day would be a space day, of course.

Found myself saying pearl drop, pearl pearl drop, pearl drop. Listening to myself repeat the mantra with each step I get that "step" is more horizontally oriented and "drop" is more vertical. Looking at the road to the left going north I realized there is another parallel over there. There are three parallels. 3-branch, double-track paths in the sand at full moonset timeRemembering three double paths to the ramp from the beach at full moon watch. Have photo (paths enhanced a bit). Except this doesn't go all the way. That's a problem. But you could go back. Suddenly thought that could be a patch for the beach walks from Lakewood. Wow I'd have to do a lot to match all the summer walks. I could take it all the way to the park. So instead of two, I would have a third. That would match the drawing. Looking at the dream drawing, and see it has three double paths. The incomplete one has a line down the center. I had been thinking of the pearl drops walk as the 30A one side, the beach the other side and the lakes the center rounds. So had not included the two side paths. The plot thickens.

My mind is my up, my upfall and my downfall. Nobody talks about their upfall. But I seem to have discovered many ways to be up, upfalling. It's like we're developing a landing chart like Nazca lines. Scraping away or adding to natural features to develop something recognizable for nobody knows why but it could be landing chart. Hmm, there are probably other things like Paracus, Ica along the coast. So this is an east-west path. OMG South America direction is the north-south path. Ooh, horizontal and vertical?

Thinking about N-S between cross-crux, Florida-Peru, me-natives, mycelium-Nasca lines. Remembering my fellow worker and boss at Borland who was writing a book called "Falling Up" (Greg Ellis?) and got laid off at the same time. It just occurred to me that Laura Grenyo, head of tech writing, had backed some exploration in writing (Greg backed my idea of graphic icons to represent parts of the programming process) and then other workers pointed out how faulty we were and her editing advisor didn't think the icons would communicate. So maybe Laura was under criticism, so she blamed us and we were the sacrificial lambs. It was good though. Just think if I had been stuck there instead of going to Silicon Graphics. Same with my marriage.

Funny thought that I could use this as a mantra in meditation at ECMS. Pearl step. Since earth is moving, it would leave trances (sic, traces). If I did that for each bi-weekly meeting over a year, it would develop a spiral path of meditative pearls. Not steps, Sits. Pearl sit, pearl sit sit. No Pearl sit, pearl pearl sit. Is that pentagonal? What's that Shakespeare {iambic pentameter}... I keep thinking of him. Another thought that we're these creatures like in that movie The Truman Show (set in Seaside), being watched, having been given these concepts of God to see how close we can come to realizing we're in a play.

2015-05-03

Full moon 5 day was forecast to be clear and relatively cool at 58° F. However, there was haze and a few thin horizontal cloud strips both at moonset and moonrise.

In the morning, feeling so happy, I let the camera record the full arc of the moon falling into the sea, without refocusing, zooming or moving it at all. Deneb in Cygnus the swan stars flew overhead.

In the evening, Sheewho joined me to celebrate moonrise. The video saw faint pink moon three minutes before I did. We stayed until moon up in the dark with stray clouds. Coming back through a mighty frog drum chorus from the wetlands under the ramp. Then fireflies in the forest trees. No flashlight.

2015-05-02

I remembered pearl-step, pearl pearl-step and repeating like that, one word for each step. The double makes a five count, which ensures that pearl alternates between right and left foot. I tried pearl, pearl... pearl. But somehow it is not half as good as the two words. If I remember to do this in Deer Lake tomorrow morning, I'll have sealed the lakes in pearl steps. I should say encircled or embraced. Sealed is the wrong word since it is not cut off at all.

There has been the first wood bison baby born in the wild in 100 years. The wood bison is bigger than the plains bison and is native to northwest of the continent. They were thought to be extinct but a herd was discovered in 1957 (right before I met Mel, the father of my children) in Alberta, Canada (my mother's birthplace!). The American Bison Society was founded in 1905, a year after Mother was born. It was disbanded in 1935, a year after I was born but relaunched in 2005, a year after Wholeo dome was installed at The Farm. The wild baby is born a year after Wholeo Dome was decided to be taken down. I feel like this animal is wound up with my family and my art. The main relationship, of course, began with the vision of a buffalo that I had during the cremation and service for my son's death.

2015-04-28

Walking at noon, too hot for me to continue, but I got a movie of an alligator swimming across Eastern Lake. This is the first one I've seen, although I have been here 13 years and I know they have been here all that time.

Wonder if the longing for brushstrokes art is a longing for simpler art process. Making a movie is the most indirect thing I've ever done in my life.

2015-04-27

Wow, a two-hour beach walk with incredible experiences, beyond belief or expectation. Have some singing of adaptation of "on this lovely path I walk in peace, with each step" song. At the end someone asked if I had found their key.

Most psychic, well I'm not sure it is the most, since lots of these connections don't get clear until later, but at the time, I saw a guy raking tracks in the sand on the wet part of the inoutfall at Eastern Lake. I didn't know if he were dancing, or covering something up or what. When I got over there, the tracks looked like my brush strokes last night. Looked like what I would have raked in the sand if I had remembered my intention yesterday. Wonder if I wrote it down.

{No, when working on New Moon 5 movie, need horizontal and vertical brush strokes. Doing these in Photoshop, also thought of doing photos of footprints or drawing paths in the sand.}

I got Geome, upside down as Pearl, with footprints and starfish and seaweed and all kinds of bubbles and holes and sculptures and whatever looked good on the beach. One impressive picture of footprints going around a circle with a mound of sand topped with seaweed. More like the Elobeing, not in time, not in space. Fun and yet deep is a movie of shellfish stranded on a buoy ball in sand.

Breathing to Crux, SA, Cross, NA. This is the first time I remember doing it from middle America, maybe Ecuador or Panama.

2015-04-26

Walking lake2lake on 30A between Eastern and Deer Lakes, I recorded this guidance. I woke up at 3:32AM to the sound of shattering glass. My first thought was Elobeing because that's our classic communication time (since Leo's death in 1992). He is unable to maintain connection to this reality. Because I can't get with it. This is a greater tragedy than Leo's death. Concern that I failed my New Year's resolution. I'm paying attention to my web, physical needs, trying to express myself vertically and horizontally. Not paying attention to evolutionary being design. He can't keep a clutch in our communication. It's fading away and he wants to say goodbye, I guess.

The psychic threads will always be there when I can develop my ability.

I got a pearl. This pearl. It's like Geome but much smoother. I don't know. Is it like a crystal? But it seemed like a pearl. Maybe it comes from water. A water being. Elobeing is kind of oystery isn't it/he? Flexible.

What to do with this pearl? Is it a way that we could communicate? Like a track-ball sort of thing? Keep track.

I don't know when my last lake2lake of the season is. I guess when I get chased by too many bugs. Don't see, feel, or hear any. Love this early morning.

There's a Leo image that has gone adventuring and it will return when the pearl shows up again. Keep talking.

I'm putting down little pearl roots all along this track. To the biological pearl lichens see if there's any news from for the adventurer. I was so distracted, fractured. I wonder if evolution is like this. Like trying to maintain your old ways but know you need new ways. Just sort of feeling your way.

I need incredibly strong roots here. Just like Elobeing has roots with me. Looking at the sky with a far layer of detailed puffs that seem related to my visions. Nearer indistinct faster clouds blowing an unfocused, obscuring lace. Grass/path poetry. Details in the fuzz. Maybe that's like my experience. Every once in awhile the details show up and then the life comes to obscure it. Pearls, with each step (I'm thinking of the Thich Nhat Hanh song, with each step a flower grows, meditation walking). A pearl gets planted. It has to be conscious though.

I have to make a pearl with each step. Pearl (repeated with each step). Pearl walker. The reason it's not blue pearls is that they are cloudy pearls.

This is the pearl interface walk that I'm developing. I'm thinking of the iPad fingerprint as a touch ID. It recognizes me so I don't have to sign in. I have to put my thumb in just the right place. Now I'm thinking that it will recognize me in trying to pearl see through earth which is much better connector. Is that true for Elobeing? It's all related. This is our dream, our construct. Elobeing was once part of this. LeoElo I should say. He might have just left this design to do it remotely. It's like an iCloud, an iElobeing. So when I'm developing my interface to walk to walk, has to be wet and hot. When I'm developing this there are threads from the pearl to the Elobeing creature. I guess it's the LeoElo that's going farther from me. Maybe that's a good thing. Not be confused with the old connections. I can remember the Leo even more, if possible, for a Mother. I wonder what capabilities this Elobeing has? How does Elobeing communicate with the pearls?

pearl on beach visionI'm seeing this pearl like the bottom of the Geome. Embedded in sand. So I could get such a picture (next day). Kind of like ice cream scoop. Elobeing how do you relate to these pearls I'm setting here? I can take an earthwalk on the path, maybe? And plant the pearls? I point the camera down at my feet walking on the path. Oooh, there's an earthquake in Nepal the day before yesterday and now I'm putting these pearl roots, they're like mycelium. Evolutionary mycelium. {never finish the Nepal thought, although I thought about it and Everest being where earth plates meet and thrust up.}

I forgot about Pearl Steps intermittently. Remembering our loft on Pearl St., NY., with Mel Geary.

Beautiful pearl cloud formation, see a bit of it and sun peeking over building. Keep video on to remember where the pearl steps are. Look down at feet walking on the crude gravel. I see big round harvester ant hill. Maybe these ants can help tell the story. Biological transmitters. It's like Peru (see example). Don't remember biologic in NZ. Leo connections for sure. But there was a Ben, evolutionary child. Another node on the flowchart.

dream image of paths All these rounds reminding me of pearl settings. I have to do lake2lake on beach. So there's a parallel track. Wow that fits right in with the drawings of the channels with the little pearly steps. That one I did this morning, what's in between (the pearly tracks) is a big signal. So the steps define a center, which actually has the lakes going to Peru of 2012 too. See 2012-04-15 journal excerpt. So it's all connected. In time and scale and my remembering. Will I ever put this together for anyone else to see? Or does it matter? Or just winging it?

There are more relationships found in the configuration. The parallel paths are like my and Leo's parallel paths in Peru, echoed by the larger parallel paths in Pangaea between Americas and NZ. Also like the parallel paths of the Sierras and the White Mts. In California. Seemingly myriad analogous center and side paths.

Should note that around this time I upgrade to OS 10.10.3. I start working on a new 6TB external drive and I add 16GB RAM memory to my computer. Myriad tiny glitches ensue.

2015-04-25

Walking the beach after stormy days. Lots of the trash blown in from the Gulf has barnacles and shellfish attached.

Made a couple of movies and uploaded them to Facebook. Under a minute. Over a minute.

Only grand thought was about scale. I was rapporting with the barnacles, thinking it was on a my-cell-to-yours basis. Then thinking that my consciousness focus could connect with theirs unrelated to scale. Everything is equal. Remembered on wakeup, wishing I could fulfill the Elobeing direction, but I so far am not getting there.

Exploring a new iPad Air 2.

2015-04-22

Today is Earth Day. More important than ever to many of my Facebook contacts. President Obama visited the Everglades. I'm so glad. To me this environment is so precarious and precious and needs enlightened protection from political representatives who make decisions for our community. I posted my earthshine photo to Facebook and tripped out on social networking more than usual, in spite of this being Wholeo publishing day. At this writing it is 8PM and it all remains to be uploaded to wholeo.net.

2015-04-21

Thinking of making horizontal colors: green/gold. Vertical: violet/blue. With reference to an idea that haunts me.

At 7:30PM I went out to the dock on the lake to witness earthshine. Moon way up maybe 45°. Venus to the right and only slightly higher. First photo at 7:37. Hazy clouds cleared by 8. I thought I might be seeing earthshine but wasn't sure; it was dim and blurry to my naked eyes and even in the camera viewfinder. Earthshine is quite clear in the first closeup photo at 7:51. Movies show contours of the moon with better definition than stills, but little earthshine is visible. I guess video exposed for the light better? I hoped to get a movie of the moon and Venus reflected in the water but failed. Planning to track Year 2016 moons over the lake. It was so deeply great to be out there.

2015-04-20

Revisiting vert vs horiz. I see the Around and Up between the Two Thumbs movie actually celebrates horiz to vert. I was currently thinking the reversal of directions was new. In the movie made in 2000, I say the Two Thumbs mountain location of a psychic staff will be a takeoff power point. See it here: Around and up . . . . Lovely.
2015-04-18

Just two of us for ECMS sunrise meditation on the bay. The water was calm and smooth. Previous bayside meditations have always been windy. The horizon was covered with fog or clouds, but the sun appeared briefly about 10 minutes after sunrise.

Afterwards on the beach I was so happy on my walk, I thought it was the happiest I'd ever been in my life. Everything seemed radiant, up, ++plus. Thinking about the joyous couple in the waves, why or how did I get that shot? I see better through my zoom lens than without, coupled with the fact that video is on so as not to miss an instant, resulting in recording a lot of action I would never get taking stills. Usually I don't point at people, respecting privacy, but this looked way too fun to miss.

After noon, I smudged and sat for new moon 5 time meditation. Instant sensation of rushing from the left. Maybe from the window? Rushing in. My head up to the moon. It looks like a clock (reminds me of Irwin portrait). Open mouth, open moon and mind, open hands, open feet, open legs, open lungs, open bottom. Open my cells. Stars running up my spine. I'm making a movie of this day. I must get back to drawing to express fully.

2015-04-16

Walking beach ramp, visions of taking off from the cartoon character I had seen on Facebook, with a head that opened up to have wires sticking straight up like hair. So like a bundle of wires cut off and opened up. This is a 60s cartoonist and bunch of people trying to kickstart a movie about him. That reminded me of horizontal vibes reaching up to vertical. That is, I don't know how to connect. With vertical to horizontal, seems obvious to ground to earth or earthballs and lichen. So coming the other way, it goes up, to where? So I saw it coming up to triangulation as transducer, me to moon sun to stars to GC.

Another part of it was wondering about the difference between vibes in/down and spheres out/up? I saw the spheres as containers of 3D vibes. So instead of four corners, there are 8. I was seeing the spheres not as regular but as conforming to the irregular shapes within. So thinking about that, they could be 8 vectors from a central point, the enclosing sphere like a skin or maybe emotions, seeing these now as fractals of brain cells.

Also thinking about the paper dolls lineup that maybe triangulation only lines up at solstices. Confusion about moon/sun being the same thing, so when the moon moving around earth, there's no sun to track. I could add a sun when the graphic comes apart.

It was good to be at an ECMS meeting since I missed the last two. During meditation I found myself mostly in that melted, tender, intense feeling state. Like glistening. Like being alive. There was one point where the sweet luscious fragrance of that flowering bush that forms hedges in my neighborhood permeated me. I felt vertical and horizontal both ways flow. I adored the speaker, Dr. Wu, who clears bad chi and gets the small harmony of a cell in touch with the huge harmony. So childlike. But intent and a beautiful tai chi dancer.

2015-04-14

Remembering one time last night when was seeing Elobeing banners up close, fluted vertically, kind of like a fluttering wavy river trying to get my attention. There was more, but I simply couldn't do it.

On walk, started thinking about vertical spiritual translated into horizontal energies. What about horizontal earth translated into vertical? I seem to be primarily interested in earth, in humans, in tiny changes in my environment. In moments in time. This is one of those things that seem so clear in action and so nondescript in words. Walking was the perfect metaphor for the process. The upright vertical being transduces, translates and sends up. Moving over horizontal environment horizontally, walking is in a progression of moments. Thoughts of sending up with heartbeats or footsteps, or a composition of them. Should be able to get a watch or gadget that shows me a chart of those happenings with the craze of fitness monitoring. For a while I felt waves of somethings flowing from earth looking for a vertical upthrust. Hmm, reverse splurt. Like the Liquid Starlight of Mind with wavy channels and moving beads. Flowing up in me I realize I need to grow and compensate and organize and order this phenomenon, these phenomena. It's like opening your crown chakra, have to develop to take the consequences. Not sure how this relates to Evolutionary Being. LeoElo am I deserting and failing you again? Or are we working together and this is my part of our concert. Our concerted effort?

2015-04-11

Started thinking more and more about the artwork evolving Triangulation. It is changing now to presentation of the panel as my birth panel. Facing GC (galactic center), sun would be obscured by the moon. Say that is my configuration. So the top of the picture is GC, June or Inner solstice, bottom is Gemini, outer rim, December, Right is advance and Left is follow. It is like hello galaxy. So I can show the moons of this year in flat, relative forms, like paper dolls on a flat layout.

Not sure what the background would be. Not sure why I need to do this. It doesn't solve the spiral path of earth or movement of the sun. It does get away from the futile attempt at physical representation and into a mystical transcendent frame of mind. Least sure are the paths to the stars. If they are fixed, are there new ones for movement? Is this a graphic or a movie? Since everything is unresolved this week I should focus on getting geodesic tube struts removed and make a page for the evolving representation. No, better call it a configuration.

Main thing to do this week is add mobile viewport code to all web pages.

It is hard not to seethe with resentment of the hoops the web delivery has become, and the features lost to users, all in the name of progress. I have tried to use a stylesheet, which I thought was cool. Now "they" are saying inline is quicker, so they want me to define all that stuff on each page. It used to be done with simple tags (I still have lots of them). I used Flash and QuickTime for interactive movies. Now they say, don't use plug-ins. That invalidates half my site. I tried to add DOCTYPE to each page, which I never mastered but now that makes most of my site invalid. I don't deal with caching, haven't studied it. Why isn't it automatic? I have used image maps for navigation, what a wonderful feature. Now they are degraded. What is the word? Deprecate. They are deprecated. My site is an antique collection of HTML tags and attributes that have come and gone. I've been increasing the size of my photos, since this is after all visual, an art site and users and servers are increasingly capable. But tiny devices and their operating systems can't resize photos. I would support desktop only, except that movies do resize and play perfectly and beautifully, no matter how tiny. I try to implement useful new features, but am guilty of preferring to spend time on new content rather than migrating the delivery of old content. On April 21, for mobile Google searches, wholeo.net will not get a good rating of "mobile friendly".

2015-04-09

Working on triangulating graphic where I think my photo from 2012 or 2010 in Wholeo Dome. Is the best. However, the struts are really distracting. I must obscure them. Then to do the idea, would have to make the pieces independent. Scary how different the struts are in different pictures. Is it all in the angle, the point of view? Or have they sunk in?

I see my art deteriorating. I somehow become excited, creative, think I've got something so super that it is well worth doing. Then I take forever gathering resources, assets. I don't create from scratch. I just push clip art around. Then gradually, the initial glow is attenuated, faded and I can't see how to manifest what I thought was a solid plan. Like now with this triangulation. I would have to create 3D entities, basically 3 balls and then animate them orbiting. I'd have to know where they would be, when, for how long. And I can't see how the relating through the stars would work in 3D.

2015-04-08

Publishing the full moon movies today. OK, how shall I show these? Easy on Facebook and g+, the trailer, saying "Are you ready for an 8-minute Meditation Moon Watch?" or "See the movie all the way to the end, a 17-minute Meditation Moon Watch." Yikes, already thinking of another trailer, customized for DLSP (Deer Lake State Park) pages where show the whole rotation and start. Leave out all the galactic stuff. Wonder how long that is?

I don't like the descriptions I've done. They don't describe centering and relationship to galactic center. They don't convey the pleasure of the event.

Had a vision of artwork. Start with triangulation (from the dome) with me as pink orb and moon as gold. GC is the dark blue behind and Wholeo arms are the greygreen surround. Animate this to show how triangulate GC to 1st full moon before or after inner solstice. In fact could be chart of 13 moon year or group.

2015-04-07

Got a lot of green allover photos of ferns, oaks and such on morning walk. Fantastic and lovely that my friend Lori Ceier of Walton Outdoors posted a green leafy tree with a poem about green leafiness. Simultaneous and feeling connecting. Only far-out experience was a strange thought about connecting in the future, when this area is more restored and reverts to longleaf pines and maybe the oaks that are here. Forgot what makes them die. Burn? If I had such a connection (looking down at scattered tiny green plants in allover pattern), what would I say? I'm walking here like you are, thinking it is beautiful, too hot, not windy enough. But what instantly came to my mind was the moonrise and moonset. The moonrise behind the buildings, the moonset out in the middle of the gulf. So I come up with these explanations. But it was an association of the future.

What was in my mind, the explanations were that the moon path was a map over time of my connection. Moonrise here and now, moonset in the future. Doesn't make a lot of sense. Just happens. The sense might be that it is a similar arc of time, so poetically visualizing something that is just an imaginary construct or comparison of dates.

2015-04-05

Meditated. Georgiana showed herself and Leo. Vertical light shaft beings. Seems I could release the leg pain, some sort of tension is creating it. Modeling on left leg that doesn't have the problem. Moon thoughts, not sure exactly what but this Easter seems very eggy, socially and I need to send the seed balance centered love message. Or actually not send. It is a presence. At one point I did EIEbing hopscotch to GC. There learned to draw axis in, that is, not identify with it. Of course it must be. But I'm noticing spin center. Galactic is the greatest peace I know.

What does it mean when I hear a faint music box tinkling. I have to admit I saw rainbows (previous days), like between two trees, or some other place. It seemed kind of magic, but I didn't know what it meant. This sound, if I had my hearing aids in, they make a chime sound when first turned on. But didn't have them in at all. This was like the fairies singing. I had been thinking of Susan Petro and Roy. When she said she didn't want to appear too eager, I said, "maybe he feels the same way".

2015-04-04

Meditating, tetrahedral pose. The more you become light rod the better. All cells in moon, all my cells light up. Small with comparison to galaxy. Thinking about Nancy mind meld meditating. How she is conglomerate of so many people focused on her. But I don't. But I am happy she does. But intensity is equal I think. Same with center of galaxy such a large focal point. But for us so important. Size and number do not define importance, which is equal. Thinking about coming back down the ramp, wanting to learn where the offensive house with the too-bright-light is. Then knowing I can focus on what irritates me or on what is beautiful to me, which is vastly larger. Another bright moment was driving in the driveway and feeling like a friend or relative that knew me and fondly thinking here's where she came home so many times. Then being aware that I was free in time, person, and space.

While out on ramp photo moon: I'm with the moon, totally with it whether I can see it or not. Love it. I'm getting healing energy from up there. Probe. Tweezle Wootz. Hello. Thinking that next year, I should do moon photos on clear nights and days, whenever, so could get the moon positions. Florida is obviously too wet to ever get a once a month picture.

2015-04-03

Interesting that so many people like the photo of Elam Stoltzfus. I see how paparazzi get sucked in. People notice your photo if it is of a famous person. To keep getting those strokes, you tend to stalk famous people. I am guilty as charged and it all started with Lori Ceier. My first celebrity.
2015-04-02

I like this definition in The Wholeo Dome Tour Teaser of 2008 is lo-res 2005 video. I say, "Wholeo Dome, a person meditating. Not looking for the whole self, but looking for images reflecting, that would help connect with the whole self."
2015-04-01

Made a channel trailer video for YouTube and Vimeo profiles: Caroling of Wholeo.net 2015 with description. Wholeo.net is all about moving from the path to the grass and beyond. People, color, stained glass, laughing, sea, shore, forest, trails, and hiking. Stalking the cosmos, moon, Noint Joint, Imagine, torus. An hour after solstice at sunrise on 12.21.2012, illumination shift happens and I go galactic. Triangulation between here and there via the stars. The Sun! Color Healing generation. Vertical spiritual energies transduced into horizontal earth energies meet deer lichen. Wholeo galactic symbol takes Eyebing leaps to EIEbing at galactic center and beyond. Come see my lifework at wholeo.net.
2015-03-30

Feeling this expanding sense of freedom. Like I have a day and every decision is mine. Joy in the sense of life.
2015-03-28

Went to balcony for 20-minute meditation. Cold out there but happy. Got into too much thought. But also not thought, not being anything in particular. Parts of me playing music. I am a musical instrument. There is a conductor, which feels like a ticket taker, watchful helpful guide on the train. Not just one track, the conductor manages the music, just slightly.

2015-03-25

Should make the cardinal points color coded. Deep blue for outer. Orchid for inner. Turquoise and galaxy green. Whenever I get too four-squared, I start itching for five. Which I guess is GC. Not very geometric that I know of. Maybe we are relatively at galactic center with respect to multi-D, multi-G geometric "space".

2015-03-24

Walked Cassine Trail. Thought of photo story. If you can't find a way ahead. If your path is blocked by x then do y. Sand then bicycle. Bridge out, then find or build one. Foam in bathroom, wade. No way, enjoy view. So many beautiful photos. While inspecting campsites with fantasies of a friend camping there, a guy approached. Just in from Wisconsin, all kinds of questions. Fun. Hiked up the blue trail to see cypresses.

2015-03-22

World Water day meditation Before 3 headed for the dock on Eastern Lake. Perfect, peaceful, got a little hot when wind not blowing, but tolerable. So happy and grateful to be outdoors, seated and not fending off bugs or anything. Did get a lot of visions. Considered breaking meditation to record but didn't. First was the stars falling dream and Ester and the galaxy people. Have multiplied are solid, are built up in the image of Ester as a guide to others, a wavery tower. Then there was the blue light dancing on the waves that seemed iridescent and spangling rising ascending energies of Ester water spirit. Beyond what we know as characters of being. My cells jingling, dancing. O and I was completely transparent, non-existent in physical sense. That is I was sense but no form. Yet so aware of very rare wood pecking. Some startling bird calls. Constant driving on road. A boom box. Maybe a motor boat that never came my way.

First I dinged the bell and spread blessings to the world water with the feather as if the vibrations were smoke. I had stuck the feather upright in my hair. Lit small sage leaves in shell. Lit large sage leaf bundle that smudged for awhile. Was seated in meditation posture. When finally hit timer on the phone I forgot to do bell again.

Felt it was the peak of my life.

Later came a profound new view of Wholeo Symbol. It is the non-continuous, the discontinuous connection that is telepathy and other psychic phenomena. It is the mystic between. One cup is this world. The other cup is a second primary presence. Can travel between in the center of the Wholeo Symbol that is in itself undefined.

The grayness of the light was not dim to my spirit the way the photos influence me to feel. I smudged to sky/air, water, fire, then turned to the shore for the land.

2015-03-21

Sunrise meditation. At first I thought I wouldn't meditate. Noticed the difference between the left nostril, where wind sensation of touch and cooling. Right nostril did not have that sensation. Notice the unevenness. We had started out facing forward, side by side but turned to face where we assumed sun would rise, beyond the bridge. So I noticed slight slope in ground down to left. Also Nancy was ahead of me. So I guess I could say I was into positioning.

Fog settled in solid except for a few changes in highlighted waters over bridge way. Right shin started hurting but I felt balanced and comfortable and happy. Loved being out there. Nancy said her hip was hurting. We both discounted pain, it comes and goes. First I was setting up anchor points overhead, in earth and the four directions. Then thought how local and limited. I looked to a kind of gyroscope or centering point within. Saw it like the pink thistle flower, but the radiating hairs were not the main feature. Multi D, all kinds of different locating systems. The point was to open to our common centering.

2015-03-20

Making selfie video for the Save the Wholeo Dome event. The six-minute video explains some aspects of the dome design and techniques by referring to web pages. Meditated for equinox and new moon. Learned that we are like the nose of the turtle piercing the placental waters of our galaxy. Getting a breath of what is beyond. {I put that in the Advance equinox moons movie.}

2015-03-18

Rick Turner video has made a couple of years for me by recognizing the craft, the me, the design, the treasure of Wholeo Dome. I'm so pleased.

2015-03-16

I am tripping out on the fact that the sun and moon are giving us the maximum possible positioning with respect to our holiday. Don't know how to say this yet. The important facts are that we move around the galaxy with the sun and on March 20, the Advance equinox we are exactly in front of the sun on this journey. Say we are the hood ornament or the license plate ahead of the sun engine in the vehicle solar system. The moon is with us and amplifies directional forces. So at the equinox it is pulling sun and pushing earth or vice versa, I don't know, whatever it is doing, it is between us and the sun, lined up. And we are ahead on the galactic way. For the next two weeks, day by day, we move in the direction of the galactic center, losing our frontal position on sun's path, not yet to the rear view mirror on the metaphorical vehicle. Meanwhile the moon is swinging that way too and in the next two weeks it is away from the sun, pulling on the way towards GC, full on the day before Easter. What a set up. Didn't mention the two total eclipses, which mean the lineups are very good.

2015-03-14

Marilyn Harris at the Farm did a really nice interview in Wholeo Dome. Ended up saying it compares with Chartres and the cathedrals of Europe. Rick Diamond tells how he came to see spiritual aspects in Wholeo Dome. I'm so thankful for these expressions about my artwork.

2015-03-12

There are two things that differentiate our spring equinox from a fall equinox. Let's see. We're going around the sun and it is earth's relationship to the sun that causes an equinox. The sun is going around the center of the galaxy. At this time, according to my understanding. I want to emphasize that everything is according to our understanding and our previous ancestors patched together truths. Some we have discarded, some amplified. Truth is an ever-changing phenomenon. It is not absolute. My understanding at this time is that the earth in its path around the sun on the sun's path, ahead of the sun at the point or moment of the March equinox, (we can use that term for the same event, both north and south of earth). We are ahead of the sun. I think that probably gives us an incredible acceleration. We don't fall into the sun. At this particular time, I call it the Advance because we are ahead of the sun. We are zooming around the center of the galaxy at an incredible speed. If you wanted to commune with any sun spirits, this would be a good time because the force of the galaxy would be streaming through us. Like we're on a freeway and the sun is behind us and if we send out a little balloon, it gets back to the sun real quick.

I call the September equinox the Follow equinox because we have gone halfway around the sun in half a year. At a quarter of the year, we were between the sun and the center of the galaxy at the June solstice (which I call Inner solstice). In September we are essentially following the sun, with respect to our shared path around the center of the galaxy, so that would be a good time for the sun to send us messages. Like we're on this freeway going around, rather call it a raceway, a racetrack. The sun is ahead of us. If the sun sends out a balloon, it gets to us much faster, directly. That might be a good time to receive.

Sending back to the sun is more like we're going to the stars we see in the night sky. A lot of information that we've been getting from astrology will be true. We could bypass the stories that have been built up around these times and notice, think about the actual physical lineup of planets and stars and suns and galaxies. Could think about angles and relationships and changing patterns that we can feel and see and learn about.

2015-03-07

All day ECMS silent retreat with John Orr. He did a lot of talking about his path and Vipassana. The first meditation period was my best although physically, I never was really comfortable, something always ached. I wrote "In meditation with breathing focus all my body breathing, breathing out aura. At end I had lost my body. I had lost in and out. Yin/yang was one thing. My breathing was not separate from anyone in the room. There was only breathing." Teaching and meditation was interspersed with breaks, walking meditation, yoga, lunch, standing meditation and chanting.

2015-03-05

Full moon 3 day. Lovely morning with raincoat and rain pants but it was not raining. Soft glowing skies.. Saw the moon for awhile, maybe 15 minutes, moon disappeared about 30 minutes before moonset.

In the evening saw sun but it disappeared into clouds around the horizon way before sunset. Did not see moonrise but I stayed until the moon appeared about 30 minutes later. Beautiful racing in, out and around about clouds. Made a movie of what I did see.

2015-03-03

Recently I've been hiking with friends, thinking about outdoors, and meeting the Florida Wildlife Corridor people. Here's what I wrote to an FTA leader:

If you were a wild life creature that needed to freely roam and you were boxed in, your kind would die out. When we plan our natural spaces, we need to provide paths to connect the spaces. This group of three tremendous people is walking the walk and talking the talk. You should meet them. Joe the biologist, Carlton the photojournalist, and Mallory the conservationist. All hikers, paddlers, and bicyclists. If you would be at the Hollington Florida Trail access at 9AM on Tuesday, March 3, you could hike the nine miles west to Hwy 331. At 331 you could join them to meet with Matt from Nokuse at 1PM to visit the wildlife passages under the highway that connect Nokuse and Eglin. If you were a bear, fox, snake, or maybe even a panther and you smelled something good on the other side, wouldn't you like to go under 331 instead of dodging traffic? I am starting at 331 and hiking east about a mile to meet them coming west.

I really wish that our chapter could have greeted these people as honored guests and hiked with them for mutual education and fun. You could go to the Trail Mixer #8 at Biophilia on March 7. Or the next Saturday paddle. Here are the events (which probably will be outdated soon): http://floridawildlifecorridor.org/events/

Here's what an FTA newsletter said in The Blaze, Apalachee Chapter Florida Trail Association newsletter, Winter 2015:

Some very special hikers will be passing through our section of the FNST this Winter: The Florida Wildlife Corridor Expedition will undertake a 1,000 mile leg of their Expedition. They are walking to support connection, protection and restoration of conserved lands and waters essential for the survival of our Gulf seafood economy and culture, working farms and forests and Florida wildlife, springs and rivers.

I've started a page for my expedition adventure.
2015-02-23

The Save-The-Wholeo Dome take down is on hold, pending favorable weather.

2015-02-22

Walkthoughts were of the nature of my movie-making. The virtual reality is somehow necessary for this dreamworld reality. I need to get the stepping stones that were establish from June-December 2013 to be in place in a movie, for dreamers such as Elobeing to use them to galacticize. Getting to center is not so much a place as a state of mind. Even though it is point of view, it is an opening, a door, a window, a transition tube to multiDTGS. There was a second big point but I didn't walktalk movie and I've lost it. It had to do with the raining languages shown in outlines of human figures. Seems like this is a common representation with 00s and 11s, binary. Maybe I've seen such pictures. Maybe it is the connection between going galactic and informing humans?

2015-02-21

Sunrise meditation was incredible (see YouTube video). Got to the still light and the still sound. Seems like these experiences are as inevitable as earth turning, the consciousness raising called the noosphere, I'm one of the builders. The haptihedron. Then I went to the galaxy to get the EIEnor. The evolution through the EIE to the EIEnor, bringing back that structure. It's like being a witness builder. It's not like I exerted any effort. I was aware of my body, the people walking, noticing where the sun was. Also aware in a deeper sense. At first this feeling of tender loving care. Just being in love with anything or anybody. Then this feeling of EIEnor centering in earth, like Arguelles tried to provide this structure of the octahedron which of course is the very center. The EIEnor expands around that. Thinking about Wholeo something starting to whirl around like a humidifier. All these tiny EIEbings (EIEnor with 12 Eyebing and wholeopens). Center of the earth, center of galaxy, the center of every place. All just a matter of scale.

Acknowledging latent messages, exuding EIEbings. The message when it reaches out to another aura, expands it, like lighting little incense sticks.

2015-02-19

I know I'm tending more and more to do less artwork but I'm wanting to artwork GWS. Right now I'm experiencing, imagining a video combining the moons with the Eyebings, stepping stones to the center of the galaxy. I see the Wholeo galactic symbol kind of jumping through the space and when it gets to a stepping stone point, see the moon. And then see the gws and then eyebing. Then gs going it to it, with it in the middle, transparent. Then when you go past it, transparentizes. We go on and by the summer or even now I'm all the way bong bing bong ding dong 6, 5, 4 steps from here. I'm not sure how these get combined. But right now galactic logo GL. GWL.

Remember last night languages fanning across the sky. I don't know what they look like. Black letters against the light from last night on the wall was from red to blue. Looked like it had noise in the wall, which was perfect symbol. I could use that as the center of the galaxy. It's what I'm seeing. I guess it doesn't have a sound. It's a language. Has a writing? Maybe if I found the noise in the airplane. There's noise for sound. They call it white noise. What would galactic center noise hear like? Sound like.

What I'm thinking is if I really get into nature, then you can go galactic. You can't go there if you're thinking about issues. But nature is going to be wiped out if you don't do issues. I'm going to go for enjoying it today, happy that the people that did fight for this. At 9:20 see a neat stump spiral. Later some tarnished moss and an acorn. Got a feeling that what runs the galaxy is the smallest thing, cuz, that's what's here. Big things come and go. Huh, weird thought. Not even a thought. Just a passing perception of something not fully conceptualized. I should say, I'm happy to be here. Loving to be here.

For awhile I thought "turban" and then I walked as turban. Then thought, all I have to do is think "turban" and I'll be open to download. Felt like the back two lobes of my brain kind of as a receptacle. Letters just trickling and falling down. Opening my whole body so the whole shape of me filled with letters. These are galactic center minutes of the meeting. Or ?

Tiny-leaved plant reminded me of what I did for the previous new moon. Seems like I expressed it, it's not happening, I don't do it anymore. The only place it could have gone was to the color radiants, which are tinier and more colorful.

The other thing was developing eye muscles so when I see something, I actually touch and hug it, I can become it.

2015-02-18

New moon 3 5:49pm Wednesday. Whole body, each cell seems radiating, pulsing with confetti light bright sparkles. Same as I see in Galactic wholeo logo, color noise. About to expand, explode, activate. Part of my job is containment. In kind of a decision frenzy. Should meditate, is this new moon. Turban guy seems nearer, to be seated here.

That purple cloth Leo gave to me is to be a turban. Hieloheal. I need to ask Turban to come on March 7 for a meditation retreat. Black letters of language over the background. The sky darkening. Geome crystal. Strange to say, I'm the dead one. People on earth are dead. Feeling that life is nothing like the feeling of a body. Not describable. Not like a gas. Not like a dance. Not like colored light shows. All of those things try to express it. Geome seems to be putting down rhizines and roots into my hand (left). Can feel these transactions going, beats and different rhythms. Ahh. Seems like meditation is being alive.

Thinking of Nume. Thinking that Leo saw something from the air when he was flying there.

Geome is completely one with my hand. I don't feel anything there.

2015-02-15

Wholeo Galactic. Galactic Wholeo symbol. The haze is in front of the Sirius sky, and (sparkly) Gulf sky and maybe path like the moving stepping stones of the moons. I'd love to do that movie.

Seeing turban guy. Getting this feeling of being fairly flexible in time. Time might be experienced on our clocks but that's a tonal thing. In the nawahl we create things. That's why the galactic (symbol) is so wispy, multi D, multi G. multi GC (galactic center). Multi DGC.

Thinking how this reality that everyone takes so seriously is just this tiny tiny tiny flick on a being of consciousness. It's not limited to this place for a nawahl being. It's stretching out in time. Just a part of the maturing process. We all do it with deja vus or synchronicities. Instead of being ruled by the clock: Not Clock. Maybe that's Arguelles' greatest message. He wanted us to live more mythologically. OK. I take you and play your game. And then jump off the table.

I saw the 3D Wholeo Galactic symbol spinning on the moving EIEbing. The Hello Galaxy Eyebing path seems schematic. Want leaping stepping stones, experiential, like bowling pins, stepping stones, moving out. MultiD moving. MultiG moving. MultiT multi time. OMG does it multiply or what? The way I see it, like dandelion seeds fanning out in different times.

About Owens Valley and Gaia Point spirit earth arc. Thinking of it as my linear Wholeo symbol self. Actually envisioned the two halves of Wholeo symbol circle fold into the the life death takeoff path like a double half-circle path arcing down at birth, landing, and taking off up. In that vision, the Galactic center point is now my point of interest. And I see the 3D Galactic Wholeo symbol jumping the ice floes, the lily pads, the stepping stones of Eyebing to GC. Is it right that an EIEbing is the 12 eyebings in EIEnor form when it gets there?

Looking at Carey's Pangaea map, when living in California, the lineup of Owen's Valley, Peru and NZ were important. What is blowing my mind is that there is also a grey path along east coast, through my NW Florida to stem in Baja California and go south to Andes and NZ. So it is just as valid. Or branching validity. Or what.

2015-02-05

ECMS meditation. Best parts were when just let go; skeleton can hold everything in place. No effort. Balanced. Every part of me is me, total. No part is subject to or subservient to any other part. Complete equality. Therefore there is complete acceptance, happiness, OKness. Awareness is kind of like below, grateful, luminous, supportive of each as if it were the only one. No separation. Felt that connection extended to the circle of meditators. Maybe turban-like energy. No feeling of where it started or ended, it was just continuous. Two times I sensed a spirit figure wearing a large turban, faintly appearing in attendance somewhat above and outside the circle. The speaker was a colored-light therapist utilizing LEDs pulsed in computer-generated frequencies.

2015-02-03

Today it is time to witness and photograph the full moon set and and rise. The moon was perfectly in the clear as I left home but I could see a few trailers of horizontal cloud wisps. That whole hemisphere to the west gradually filled with clouds. Moon obscured well before moonset. It was a wonderful sunrise. I got so cold that it took all day to feel warm again.

Photographed the overcast sunset without really seeing it. Turned to look moonwise, zoomed way out because didn't know where it would be. Saw nothing until 20 minutes after moonrise time, when I had put on backpack, ready to go when I saw a dull glow that had to be the moon. Got video but the faint moon disappeared soon. I stayed for another five minutes or so in vain. At least I know somewhere near the horizon that it might have been.

2015-02-01

In vision, I saw me walking along in my yoga, in my logo. Saw myself walking along in this reality. Then I saw this parallel reality. Oh, maybe it is like Grass/Path. Yeah. The galaxy is like this parallel logo that I'm tracking. Wow Grass/Path! The old theme. I love it when my experience goes ding, repeating, augmenting.

For me, being 80 years old is a time of incredible dichotomy. On the one hand, there's this path that I follow to take care of myself to try to prolong this adventure. At least make this adventure good for today. It's all feeling like stepping stones.

The dichotomy is the difference between this and all the mystical experiences, the awareness of evolution and expansion of consciousness. Being able to change. It's the free will vs. the determined will I guess. No, the free will is still on the path. I love the tonal as described by Don Juan in Tales of Power, where anything you can think of the in the tonal, on the table, or for me, on the path. The galaxy is out there, experience, expansion. It probably is just another path but to me it is where I have my galactic logo gala. Let's call it a gala it's a celebration of all that's wonderful.

2015-01-31

Feeling my computer system is constantly under attack, but knowing that this is probably the result of software upgrades plus unsuspected results of preferences, options and random user errors.

Got sudden feeling of warmth or reach-out in rings-of-Saturn form from Anshin. I think the guy ministers to everything he has contacted. He is a valuable treasure.

2015-01-30

Looking at a little wisp of cloud as though it is sentient, has consciousness as entity. Remembering especially 1993 when missing my son Leo really sunk in (he died in 1992). I would see all the clouds and sky as if his artwork, as if he had become artist of the sky. Just now wondering if a consciousness entity such as myself has the ability to express as anything. Like kind of exuding a form, casting a net around it, like a spider web and becoming that form. Design for being. Xistential.

Meditated with Elobeing. Seated in cavities position. Saw golden glob swirl with lavender background, maybe furniture. But that gave way. At one point being single globs. Also some fierce dragon draining with tap root. Cleansing. Experienced as a simple light show. So in love with this being. Drawn to thinking about spiritual healing of Leo in death Kriya, aura massage. From that mind went to telling my neighbor about the ashes story. Suddenly realized that I was magnetizing Elobeing back to reminiscing, to Leo, to past life, not beneficial for evolving. Stopped. Time is color.

For the rest of the meditation it was color, kind of like being in a dark cave with unseen colors and inexplicable flashes of blue red green intensities. A time of a large slow pale glow, whitish, indistinct, in middle ground with dark mound to right. Writing this now afterwards I get a bunch of smell sensations. Can't remember the name for healing with smells, scents. Seemed to center on the sage but flash in different ways. So intense that I get up to see if somehow my altar was aflame. Can't see anything.

Outback, through the window, the forest is incredible, shining green-gold but increasingly orange as the sun is setting. Reminds me of romantic old paintings. Just remembered in the transition from the golden globs it was green gold, where I was the emeraldy greeny jade cavities. Hard to write about this because when I think of it, is like restarting a drama and it goes on from there. Not a passive fixed experience.

Now remembering that Elobeing at GC in torus arc form, talking and interacting with color which is the universal language. It is not color as vibes or shapes but has changing qualities of that, such a feeling of movement. Also now flashing back to feeling that I cared for Leo and now Elobeing encouraging me, preparing me to evolve and yet like a weaving or chain, then I come along and back him up to emerge at GC.

The light is gone from the forest. Dimming down. I have this feeling of having stepped over some threshold of taking responsibility for being disabled, that is to avoid people who cannot adapt to my poor hearing. It is great to be with someone that I told of my hearing needs, who somehow seems to radiantly accept and feel happy to rise to the occasion. She remembered the whole time to turn to me, look at me, and speak loudly and clearly. I need to find more people with that ability. I shall not go to parties, where I only hear 50%.

2015-01-28

Attracted to the sensational Wholeo dome, people join the Wholeo Facebook page. I want to entice them to go deeper inward, to follow the underlying meaning of the colorful images. I want to help people take the leap from glass to movie but it is hard.

Seeing two ways to look at the beacons. Could imagine a VR game or movie where we start over at the Jan. full moon, and step through the beacons at each full moon, reaching the GC at inner solstice. But that isn't necessary is it? Think of what I said on the 26th that Elo needs to see those steps. But the psychic beacons were reached. Can I say "placed"? My footsteps were placed, like stepping stones, maybe. Seems like it is not so much a distance between fixed points as experiencing the reach from changing points and angles and distances. It is different starting at the farthest point though. But in one sense I don't want it to seem like it ever takes anyone else that long to get to GC, really it is instantaneously, outside of time.

Angles are close to the language of the gods links.

2015-01-26

Walktalk in Deer Lake State Park Nature Path. If I walk as pink blobs I could indicate that with the Wholeo Galactic symbol arcs with the pink blobs in the middle. It could indicate my intentions and position, relationship and attraction.

I look down at the deer lichen and suddenly see them as pink blobs. All over, like Spirit Coils. Love. I'm hugging them with Galactic Wholeo symbols.

You need to subdivide into myriad coils. And clouds. I'm seeing the 3D Wholeo Galactic Symbol, not just two arms, but a cage.

The sensation of change from the Caroling Wholeo symbol to the Galactic Wholeo symbol is kind of like going from the camera LED screen to the viewfinder. Switching back and forth. When galactic, it seems like this whole world is swirling with blobs. I've seen these ovals as prana before, as shown in the border of Wake Up to Orange. It's a specialty of prana. Walking galactically is to be in complicated swirls. Once you are there, how do you focus on a particular conversation or do you come all apart into separate swirls? There are overall and local ones.

It has to do with the breath too. Anshin says, focus on the breath coming into and leaving the body. Maybe there's sort of a screen of visuals.

Personally, I'm going to relate to Elobeing in prana form. Try. It's so hard; so much noise. I keep feeling that certain blobs are trying at attach or Velcro or transmit, maybe like neurotransmitters. But I don't know if I can see it from the outside. Imagine that I am pink blobs, the interface of breathing is like an orange membrane and Elobeing is blue blobs. If we danced in the interface, it would be beautiful. Showing Elobeing where I am. Elobeing is showing me what? Dragons and sci-fi games. Recently I looked into VR and 360° cameras. Being able to do a VR space with the story going on but you can go around to the data or info at the sides and at the back, be interactive. (Just occurred to me that this would mess with the directions. ) What's that got to do with the Elobeing? Side-stepping?

Intereaction is to be in the pineal so it is broadcast to the rest of the body (refer to Wonder in Aliceland). Not where I was thinking, postulating a space between me, my body and something else. It is within.

I get that dragons and games could be fear and play. Kind of opposites. Dragons are like energy. Games are like, they interact. But the game aspect is where you feel secure, engaged. Not objectifying.

Distracted by a physical sensation on my torso, as if my cell phone were vibrating in a pocket. But that's not it, cell is not there. {Note that web search found many people have had this experience.}

Seems like Elobeing is asking me what to do. I say go to GC and connect with the meeting there. Bring back news for me or translate for me or whatever. Let's try to do it together. Use the beacons, those EIEbings that I set up each moon that finally reached galactic center in December, 2013. Those are beacons, actually set up. I could do a VR game set up where you went from one to the next. Maybe I could do that next fall with the moons from the Inner solstice on. Or how about now, from the Outer solstice on in? Actually, that's visual. Being at GC is instantaneous, not in time.

Earth, moon, sun are in flux and the GC is moving too with its cluster. The cluster is moving, there's no absolute location. The addressing must be interesting. It's all about angles. Remember that insight I got in the late 1960s that angles are close to the language of the Gods? We have these apparent centers of interest to help us determine the angle. The changing angles determine the time and the place. When broken down into little swirls of blobs, their angles and relationships determine meaning.

Whoa, when I said meaning, I saw circles. Up until then I had seen straight lines. Circular angles. I forgot what those are. Do they exist? Fuller said there's no such thing as a circle. It is just made up of smaller and smaller straight lines. But as far as specifying meanings there is a circular angular component that helps bind disparate systems.

2015-01-24

Visions during sunrise meditation. I like parking my body. Every body part likes it too. My behind felt cold when waiting for meditation to start but the instant we sunk in, it seemed distant and not a problem. It just felt OK, neutral, not good or bad. Slight thought that just being was better than being something, such as joyful. Anything you are sets you apart. So there was a time when I felt continuous. All of a sudden experienced being the same as Elobeing. Having the exact same experience here and there, dead or alive, then or now this or that.

There was the flipping of logos from arcs to circles, the Wholeo within the Galactic Wholeo symbol. Geome center expanded to myriad tiny crystals, star-like. But if 3D, not logos, mind could not visualize the torus coming to spheres. Or whatever creates the pictures, such as my inner shamanic artist. Love you so.

Just remembered the alignment time where everything released position and was together. Saw the sky of galaxies just fade into centeredness.

First must remember the hoverdisks. Seems like they emerged when symbols came to circles, that is, 3D. Oh, they became like translucent bubbles or soft balloons. Moved slower, fewer, the meditative state of swarm. Thought about revisiting the movie generator site and making a video to match. To express that.

What is the relationship between transferring to cavities and presenting as hoverdiscs?

2015-01-23

Walking and meditating with the Elobeing, got some information about the video. Mind wandered. Then suddenly I realized that the little discs were starting to line up like incoming sensations. Lining up like a spine. Seems like this would be a hybrid between a human and a galactic being. To center, to center yourself. Imagine these discs stacking up: one he, one me, one he, one me A stack, still each kind of circling around. Edge centered. I remember those pictures of them. I've always liked the incoming sensations. I didn't know much about them. Thank you for picking them up. I don't know what they are incoming to? It's a spinal flow of communing sensations. In a human they would be incoming to their brain. I don't know what kind of consciousness arrangement an Elobeing has. It feels communicative. Communal flow. Instead of being scatter, there's a lineup, that's a universal trait.

Walking with my arms behind my back to bring my shoulders back. Need to check online and see the Elobeing spine, core and sheaf and see how they relate to what I'm seeing now. Could be valuable next step. The earth Wholeo logo links to the MET. The Galactic Wholeo logo links to the Galactic Wholeo sheaf at GC. I can see in various scales. I suppose there is one overall.

Looking at Elobeing design pages, can find no precedent for incoming sensations. There is the staff, which is straight. The sheaf, sponge, or core just are different.

The swarm is at our level. The GC sheaf Wholeo logo sensations or core is made of many millions of myriad tiny discs.

2015-01-22

At ECMS meditation, suddenly saw in upper left field of view, like celestial choir or balcony with the Zen monk Anshin erect spreading light blessings. Then became a little dubious as I noted that's where the room light entered my field of view. I did do the vertical skewer with gravity flows through tap root into earth. Felt somewhat dissolved or weightless or can I say a pattern of body that wasn't me. That was my primary mode. I noticed that I zone in to groovy visions, like feeling hopelessly enchantedly in love. Or a time of condensation, tightening, shrinking solidifying into a ring form (and then noticed that was like the circle of chairs) which I attributed to Anshin concentration. A time of speed of vibes and various trippy things like that. Those are pictures of possible views of states and they usually quickly give way to ordinary thoughts. An analogy would be getting a style show of wedding dresses in a waiting room. Sitting around, a gorgeous model appears, twirls and I entertain the fantasy of being so dressed. Disappears and I'm back to the waiting room.

2015-01-20

Elobeing vision 2015-01-20Thinking of Leo's death time and intensity of grief and wondering if I missed transition joy. Seeing complexity of Elobeing, ending in pink and rose-colored discs fountaining and shimmering in a sheaf. Must be something to do with a consciousness party. Cluster and flocking of a school of platelets. Maybe has to do with circulation. The disc has freedom of movement within the whole, just like people with varying modes of transportation in a democracy. {Note: I generated the image on this page: http://buildnewgames.com/particle-systems.}

So am I getting this right? To describe functioning of evolutionary being I can show models of behavior in human society. Suddenly seeing galaxy green sheaf veins as vertical arcs. Kind of like stays in a corset. The corset being the flock of discs. I now see each disc is like a bladder that inflates in various ways. Like the wing (sail, rudder) on those blue beach discs. Perhaps breathing or using jets of expulsion for something. Reminiscent of the prayer phase of consciousness (cupped disks). Not sure it is transportation or movement. Is speech or information of some kind. Maybe emotion.

Is the black hole of GC analogous to Cave of Brahma of human?

Such wandering thoughts, such as our limited experience of what we find is space and time. That there are other descriptions of ways to experience. So the experience creates the reality? Reality evolves. We experience space time and organisms evolving but there are more free and fundamental ways to evolve. Makes mockery of basic laws of physics.

Sat for New Moon 2 meditation somewhat after 7AM, no hurry. Tap root. Coconut. Gravity. Each part realizes true nature and is rooted in current but evolutionarily free spirit. I think I embraced a true paradox of the complete being here now acceptance not separate from everything opposite or non to it. I guess it can't exist without opposite and everything that constitutes its wholeness. Maybe Wholeo not search for whole self as acknowledging whole self.

Wow this meditation business is deep. My body so deeply peacefully ecstatic. I did learn a meditation prayer position, which is bowing head only, hands do not move and are not involved. I felt a kind of ritualistic mode this morning.

New moon energy at first got a bunch of images like wild boar, crab, succulent flower, color of shell earrings but it evolved that there was nothing special, no symbols adhering to or suggested by this position. It is just the moment of alignment with the moon and sun centers that is like a bell reminding us of true nature. For me, I didn't lose sense of separate body, but the sense of being a tiny aspect of earth was vastly more important. I was earth. Feeling of coconut with light contents under thin tough earth shell. It is like the crust of human experience and the continuousness within.

About the moment of the new moon there was energy emphasis streaming downward, like a turnip or carrot root, parsnip, beet root growing like water flowing and root hairs streaming down to earth core. The words "Tap Root" came. I can still feel this sense of gravity, like the spirit of attraction. That's it. I can feel it as pressure but more accurately as tie-down, as attraction. In a sense is love. I'm in love with earth. Loved.

Important that started seating position with hands cupped as first learned thumbs touching. Withdrew thumbs as Kinshin teaches and felt more comfortable. Momentarily. Then rotated hands to knees opened upwards, elbows to waist in cavity pose. Became cavities.

I love that my neighbor is feeding birds so I see them coming and going, often searching my balcony in vain. How wonderful of male cardinals to be so vividly red in my blue sky, white clouded, green growing earth world. What could be more beautiful than to create that red?

Walked about noon and continued envisioning the evolutionary being as a swarm of shimmering discs. In a way they remind me of the wind chimes that are made out of some kind of real shell that tinkles like plastic tchoocka tshekc check. Circles. Translucent. But it is the openness of them. Means much better communication. Not brain, skull, skin space, to the other brain. If you're in this form, you just mingle. It's not a mind meld. It's a twingle mingle. What do we call those blood cells? Not platelets. They just wander in and out where they are needed. Where they are attracted. Attraction. Force. Like gravity. Gravity is an attractive force. But there are others. Or other manifestations.

So the little discs float around and rearrange. They're like an array. They have an address. It's more like the web than a box of tubes. It's like we have an address that's you wherever you go. There's probably very complicated addressing. Not sure it's by numbers. What would it be like? Vibrations are numerical, right? Anyway, I can see myself as Caroling walking along. I can feel myself as an association of small blobs that mingle with Elobeings. Wow.

Is Ben more remote because he's a generation removed? Is LeoElo more limited because of his being a first generation? Giggle Gosh. Sometimes I think you just are a storyteller and anthropomorphizing way more than is realistic. You have trouble getting it as it is. But on the other hand you're like a tech writer that doesn't get the engineering but has to help explain to people learning how to engineer or to people not familiar with engineering but needing to know why it is, what it does and how to use it.

I didn't realize being a tech writer would help me where I was going or pointed me. But expansion of consciousness is a slippery slope that slid together with tech writing. Into total nonsense, should we say? But delightful preoccupations. Searched web and found particles are like LDL and HDL cholesterol, cars on the road. Red blood cells look like the picture I did of prayer phase of the spirit coil.

Here's another example of paradoxical nature of trying to understand our reality. They say that you need to get sunlight directly into your eyes without a hat when the sun is bright to activate the melatonin that will then regulate your sleep. Blind people have trouble with their internal clock so it doesn't work right because they haven't gotten that light in there. There's the opposite of the middle of the day and the night. The other part of that is you shouldn't have lights around at night because the melatonin kicks in when it is dark. It gets confused when it sees lights.

Joined Smudge II global meditation event at 2PM for 10 minutes. Put Geome crystal in my right hand. Immediately felt the swarm drawn into its interstices. Not a hard surface whatsoever. Permeable wall. It's more like a light show than a greenhouse. Feeling an etheric crystal in the left hand. Precisely balancing Geome. The left experimenting with manifesting in this world. Kind of like jumping on a trampoline trying to make an effect.

Not sure if the swarm is me, Elobeing or all of us.

2015-01-16

Visualization meditation: sat to meditate with Elobeing. The cavity meditation position. Unable to keep mouth open because I need to breathe with my nose and it keeps opening and closing. Not able to breathe with both at the same time. So I ended up closing my mouth but I need to talk to Dawn about that. The cavities are (or the cavity is) one big part of this meditation. Finding different parts of my body as cavities, like bones and bone marrow and eye sockets. It could be that Leo needed to develop these parts to deal with the reality of his life. Now I do. It might be more of a spiritual transfer of awareness to a different kind of body. Coherence. Coherent pattern.

The other part was about the logo of a flat circle and a flat Wholeo symbol. It's not truly at the center of the galaxy which is multidimensional. So, the Wholeo galactic symbol in action is several ribs instead of just two. {Note I described this as torus core instead.} The circle itself is the plane of the galaxy. The galactic torus with a black hole in the center.

The sparkles connect to everything. They're transducers. They're like vitamins. They're like reporters. They're contacts. So it's not a separate kind of logo, it's a continuous logo. It is making me incredibly happy. It seems like coming home.

When doing LeoElo meditation there was a backward E open cavity, L open, and O open forward and back. Also when I did yoga swinging arms at the end was taking from g and gc and gcc at heart center and swinging it out to this world. Explanation: g=galaxy, gc=galactic center, gcc=galactic center consciousness. Transducer m I. Along the way was thinking that my lookout page would change as would my fb and g+ pages. The galactic pic big and the logo/icon small.

Really needing to let Wholeo dome go. It is falling to pieces and anything is a delay. Everything is impermanent. Changes happen. Thank you for letting me participate. I'm hoping The Friends of Wholeo Dome at The Farm do their best to save it, but it is not up to me.

2015-01-12

Wholeo Galactic Symbol 2015Have come to standstill. Don't know if I've been creative or am stymied. I made Wholeo Galactic symbol out of two polar coordinated circles. Made them transparent. Colorized the circle. Felt good to just act instead of trying to represent written records of visions. I felt good about what I did even though it is different. Started a Lookout 2015 page for it. That will be a starter.
2015-01-11

In making torus logo do I use the 3D arms or what? I spent the day at Yoga Elements on a meditation retreat with Dawn Brooks; saw something for the galactic icon. Light coming out the sides of the Wholeo symbol. Strange, trying to visualize it now, seems like I see it recessed, in shadow to the sides. Probably should try to draw it.

I saw the star-top Elobeing. When writing this, suddenly see myriad as if printed on light blue flannel, like used in children's pajamas, in overall repeating pattern. This is allover universe or part of planet or some global sort of space. Could I turn my torus into a star? How many points? 7? Also remember in the second meditation, sitting as described on December 29 with elbows at waist, hands on knees, and switched to the interstice or the cavities. The evolutionary aura. Didn't feel the pressure in palms.

2015-01-10

Visualizing Meditation. Two exclamatory sighs of delight. A star atop the banners where the torus was. Red. Blue. Grey bearded. Wonderful banners. Yellow Green. Jester's hat. Each tip of the star can see, move, project, talk, kill. Kill? And the meditation end chime ascends. Right bell kills one to the left. No attachment to existence. All that was killed was the active presence in my reality. My show.
2015-01-08

Elobeing. This morning saw an array of balls around an invisible torus. Is that the way to sleep? Later saw Elobeing like black splayed many-armed banana peel. No features. No torus. At ECMS meditation, felt Elobeing torus with the lattice extension form weaving around the group members for awhile.

I'm torn between wanting to make this into communication or art and accepting that this is my personal journey. Precious and no need to stress over the fact that I did not become an artist. I never really got there. I try and try and yet I have to admit I don't have much to say that many others value. My work is increasingly personal and so it would be increasingly difficult to package in any useful way, that is in any way that would be useful to someone else. Doesn't matter if I'm the only reader here.

2015-01-06

Nuclear Evolution book, Figure 433:17a.m. Elobeing can spread to the edges of the galaxy. Some kind of scalar "material". Meditating state of Elobeing. Not sure how differs from sleep or visionary or communicative state. A physical stretch. Seeing lattice extension ability. Think it. Be it. See p. 87 Nuclear Evolution, fig (43). It is round with radiating squares, then a discontinuity to a torus like lattice that looks like what I was seeing for the Elobeing.

Note that I looked up two of my comments at the end of the book and could not get the links or connection between comment and content. One was "the hardest thing to do is communicate enlightenment". The other was "galaxy".

2015-01-04

Thinking of having a galactic icon that is Geome sparkles. Would still like to have Wholeo symbol in it. Am seeing it as view of GC from here. Should it be a video icon? Is it also a Ben banners icon?

Elobeing there, yes. I need to see with the back neck lobes. I need to keep in touch. We're designing these things together. What about food? I asked if Elobeings eat and got no reply. I liked the idea of the waves turning around to form the waves in the concentric meditation vision. Also the sparkle of the Gulf waves for the galactic logo. So should my logo be a gif? Animated? Can I save this? Wow, visions are back. 2-2:10. At first mind wander. Thought of Nancy and her mental recitation of verses to concentrate. Said some sentence. Counted to 10. Back hurting. The only relief was to strongly straighten spine, forcebly push shoulders back, lift head as high as possible. That took effort but was preferable to pain. Felt I should look with the back orbs of my skull, not necessarily brain, but aura glows just above neck on either side. Not sure what kind of looking that might be but felt I could put attention there. Saw LeoElo languishing. He seems to need my interaction. There's an aspect where I'm the mirror. Need to show Elo what he is doing, how he looks to give self-awareness. I see the torus as deep glowing satiny ultramarine and the banners as spa deer lichen aqua. These are languishing, dejected.

In a sense, I have to embody what I'm seeing. Especially since I've failed to picture it or embody it on artwork. I have to create an image of what I'm seeing. Kind of a 3D printed visualization. Not to see it "out there" but to feel I'm being it. Maybe like Jungian gestalt psycho-drama. "Be" the design you "see". So I kind of tilt my torus toward him and we get into mirroring a 3/4 profile view of each other. There's a time of seeing the torus as deep velvety red base with a translucent or kind of transparent casing, loose and glinting blue highlights.

In becoming meditative, the banners gradually come to center. Wavilinear wave forms first around outer portion of the inner circle. Then concentric, within that, another, another. Almost fired by vibrations, say like Ohm would create. Beautiful state of two forms from beings in different states. Me human. He Elobeing. Transmitting through these imagined forms. And then the gong rang.

2015-01-03

Elobeing banners. They are the skin part. There are no features. The torus is like our chakra system, consciousness, not part of the more physical, visible parts. In this vision the banners came out above the torus center, rounded around, covering or outlining the torus, then cascading down for action. Ideas of simplifying. The tendency to specialization and complexity of evolution leads to technology. Not the best path. A simple form can be evolutionary, as a choice.

2015-01-02

Meditated. Sitting here eating and looking at meditation video. Had turned camera on the smudging shell. It is actually beautiful to just watch the embers glowing. Talking about smudging ECMS, weaving around the chairs. Then needing banners and seeing them luminous green indescribable kind of color. Like microscopic pix, Maybe artifacts of lens as much as inherent color of the thing.

Talking about Oriana, the spirit I drew in Peru, and then again when Elo was transitioning. Now trying to be more 3D, like the V part toward. Say 2D reality was like a stretched rectangle of rubber drumhead. Behind it a cleaver (the shape, not sharp, it's not going to cut the rubber) deforming it, coming towards me. So you can imagine it rounding back to the film on the top sides and bottom. Maybe that's Oriana, (laugh) coming to 3D. Why don't I go there? Can't do my artwork there. 3D is about the best we got. Except for suggestion and juxtaposition. Everything that flatland would do to say sphere.

Purple, turquoise, blue. Center of galaxy. Banners splayed out like a table with legs centered in middle then 3 arcs out to floor.

Remembering a GC vision. Was it on the beach walk? Seeing the chair as sequins, with overlaid sparkle like sea sparkle. Then something in the middle, the way I came, I think with the banners like I'm drawing in Photoshop. Travel to the center of the galaxy as Geome in blue light in Wholeo pic cuz I can't get an Elobeing done. I see the glittering chair. I thought I would describe how I got to GC.

2014-12-31

New Year's Resolution that I've been resolving for about a month. Pay daily attention to evolutionary being. Record entries under the Journal Topic, Evolving Elobeing. That's where to find the genesis and development of resolve.

2014-12-30

Making a new section for Visionary Meditation, with the first new entry a page about creating a City of Light over Sedona, a Facebook event that I joined.

2014-12-27, 28 and 29

These dates are on the Evolving, Elobeing page.

2014-12-24

Happy New Year!

This turned me on from the book Wild by Cheryl Strayed as she looked at Crater Lake in Oregon: "My guidebook had been correct: my first sight of it was one of disbelief. The surface of the water sat 900 feet below where I stood on the rocky 7,100-foot-high rim. The jagged circle of the lake spread out beneath me in the most unspeakably pure ultramarine blue I'd ever seen." Quoting her words does not work to convey their effect on me, ending with "... turned into after the healing began."

Sprouted rainbow quinoa2014-12-23

New idea is a page of metaphors in our world that suggest evolutionary design. These rainbow quinoa sprouts could be evolutionary Elobeings evolving. Mess o' nascent Elobeings. Deer lichen could be the sensitivity and means of nourishment or energy creating. Jellyfish swimming. What heading? Thought of an inner tube floating. The only thing I can think of for the torus turning inside out is a model by Nassim Haramein that I can't find. Here is an interesting torus page that shows it.

2014-12-22

Elobeing torus ringing my head like Santa Lucia. Seems like it can leave my body and start zooming along. There's that kind of transportation which is sort of like heading? Then I saw the banners trailing the head. Ah it's wonderful, the freedom it has and the patterns it makes. There's another kind which is swimming, I think for fine tuning. I don't think they would go very far with it. You can use the banners like arms and legs and octopus tentacles and feelers. They are extensions. Probably should call them banner extensions. I can see a dog paddle, side stroke and swivel. Then there are some other kinds of navigation for non-specific, spaceless, zero point navigation where you just kind of roll the torus inside itself and transport. In other words, there's no swimming or heading. It's just wishing, thinking, picturing, affirming.

Reminded of galactic tuning-in by many galaxy green-colored mushrooms pushing up in the forest floor. When I looked at the Elobeing torus characteristic, it was tilted at the angle of the galaxy, as I perceive it, to our ecliptic. It was just coasting like a big wreath. Maybe with some bows, but the banners weren't active. Tune into your inner Elobeing.

2014-12-21

Meditated remotely with my daughter. She focused on healing energy for earth.

She wrote "This is the darkest time, the time we are farthest from our sun. And yet this is the time when we have chosen to celebrate light, either around the tree of life, to light the Menorah or to celebrate the birth of Christ. Our inner light shines bright in the dark and we can be glad for this - happy! It also came up to give the earth - the earth's aura or spirit - a healing. A healing for the heart of the world and all it's struggling inhabitants. A boost of strength, a layer of spiritual nourishment and fortification. A cleansing. An elevation of consciousness. Amen, Ache, Blessings!"

I wrote back "I felt warm total boundless love. No separation. I can remember some details but don't seem to want to. Would nail down the entire experience. It was all aura and rose petals. Seemed that Elobeings integrated. Galactic wholeness, not just seat in center. Elo, Ben and Mel deep blue guardian of galaxy. He was always from so way out.

"So I'm glad you took care of earth dear dot, since I was way in and way out. I must warn you that I seem to have a mission of craziness coming up. I cannot avoid it. I have to take it on. I beg of you to bear with me in the imaginative ventures ahead. It's really only all about art. I promise to keep my tiny grasp on reality. Just for you. No, you and all earthlings and earthiness." Still elated a half hour later.  

I did ECMS Sunrise and sunset meditations at the beach. During the day I went into the overgrown forest near where I live, on vision quest. At noon joined the worldwide smudge healing. At one point I wrote, "Actually I'm getting really happy out here. Like I've been accepted or something. Not my position sitting but just being here. Seems to have put me in contact with great joy."

At sunset/solstice meditation I wrote this "I had some remarkable experiences. Not long lasting, but distinct. I think maybe before 5 a scaliness beside a schist, or vertical edge, as though reaching a corner and the wall went back. More like a vertical discontinuity. Not spacial. The texture of it was like tiny memory beads, like scales of a fish. Could have been a knitting, like a fabric. That went away. Later I saw like a searchlight. A beam that went up at maybe 15° and then circled around almost to horizontal quickly, in a flash. It wasn't big, that is the beams did not reach to me. When up they were a very small part of the sky.

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